In a small town with no name, in an old tavern, the wooden boards creaked, but it did not affect the noisy people enjoying the smell of alcohol.
Deadpool raised a glass of ice-cold orange beer and shouted, "For Uncle Sam."
Other patrons in the tavern also raised their glasses and shouted after him: "For Uncle Sam!"
He chanted again: “For Disney.”
Other guests followed: "For Disney!"
Deadpool shouted again: "For the beautiful girls."
Like an echo, others responded: "For the beautiful girls!"
Finally, Deadpool ordered: "Suck it!"
So everyone drank heavily until the alcohol foam covered their beards.
Peter next to him held his forehead with one hand, looking like I didn't recognize this embarrassing guy. It turns out that in a pub, the more sober the person, the more miserable they are.
The two of them drove through this town in a pickup truck half an hour ago, but when Deadpool saw the sexy and graceful beer girl on the roadside billboard saying that all drinks had a 50% discount, he couldn't help but want to come. check it out.
Deadpool quickly became involved with the guests in the tavern, because his first words after pushing open the shutter door were, "The next round of drinks is mine."
Then came the various toasts and toasts, which Deadpool is extremely talented at.
A stranger nestled on a sofa in a bar attracted Deadpool's attention. He was an overweight man with a rough beard and hair. He looked neither healthy nor hygienic. The position where he sat had been stained by long-term contact. The same shadow as his size.
It was initially determined that this person was a frequent visitor to the bar and would sit in the same seat every time he came.
Deadpool walked over with a beer: "Brother, are you from this town?"
The fat man frowned, looked at Deadpool, a weirdo, warily, and said, "Except for you two, all the guests here are from this town."
He was referring to Deadpool and Spider-Man.
Deadpool said happily: "Then you must know that billboard on the road outside."
He nodded, a little confused as to why Deadpool asked this, but still said that he knew about the billboard.
Deadpool seemed to have seen the dawn of victory: "Then you must know who the woman on the billboard is."
The fat man suddenly realized that Deadpool was here for the woman on the billboard. He smiled and said: "Oh, you are talking about Janice. She no longer works here, but she lives next to the church in the town. You You can go there to find her.”
Deadpool briskly pulled Peter to go to the church in the town. At first, Peter thought he was going to pray, but Deadpool didn't look like a religious guy. Later, he realized that this bastard wanted to find excitement.
"I don't think that's a good idea," Peter said.
Deadpool said righteously: "But I already know her name, Janice, what a nice name. Cupid's arrow has already hit both of us. When I knocked on her door, we both They will become a couple who are overwhelmed by love."
This is not love, this is someone's lust, Peter concluded directly.
"But why do you want to drag me along?" Peter asked puzzledly.
Deadpool said: "Of course it's emboldening, and with you next to me, I won't look too weird wearing this uniform."
"Believe me, your strangeness has nothing to do with your uniform. No, I would rather stay here and wait for your good news than accompany you and knock on the door."
Peter refused to be his wingman because he didn't want to lower his moral bottom line to the same level as Deadpool.
For Deadpool, his bottom line can be as low as the eighteenth floor of hell.
So Deadpool left happily humming a tune by himself, while Peter stayed in the pub drinking.
For Peter, who had strengthened his metabolism, this alcohol concentration was not even enough for him to be convicted of drunk driving.
The fat man who was spoken to by Deadpool just now said to Peter: "Don't worry, he will be back soon. That billboard beside the highway has a history of more than thirty years."
More than thirty years of history, that is to say, Janice, who was still in her prime at the time, should be in her sixties now.
"But how is this possible? Ordinary advertising stickers can't last that long."
"Replaced, using the same picture." The fat man explained to Peter thoughtfully.
Another person laughed loudly: "Who is this guy who has been tricked into coming here? Hall, the owner of the tavern, uses this trick to attract outside guests like you."
"Janice next to the church is already an old lady."
“He could help her put on her reading glasses and then we could have a service at church and then knit together in the back garden.”
"Janice is a devout believer and she will forgive his offense."
Everyone burst into laughter, showing no mercy because Deadpool had just treated them to a round of drinks. Every time this happened, they would throw a coin into the box, which was now filled to the brim.
Peter thought: Oh, poor Deadpool, how disappointed you will be when you open the door and find Janice is an old man.
After a long time, Deadpool returned to the tavern, and people in the town began to laugh at him: "How about it, have you seen Janice? Is she exactly the same as in the photo?"
Facing their cynicism, Deadpool just smiled and said calmly: "Although Janice is no longer young, her eyes are still beautiful."
Hearing this, Peter became a little nervous: "Damn it, Deadpool, tell me you didn't do anything. I know you are an unscrupulous bastard, but you should still have a bottom line, although that line will be deeper than anyone else's. Be low.”
Deadpool said, "No comment."
Peter looked at Deadpool with a mean smile on his face, wondering whether he was trying to show off or if he was really so shameless.
Maybe he was secretly crying under the mask.
"You're just hiding your frustration, aren't you?" Peter said.
"No comment." Deadpool still refused to answer anything about Janice.
No matter who asked him, he was given the same perfunctory answer, so that everyone was guessing what happened during the time when Deadpool left.
Peter quietly asked Deadpool: "Wade, tell me secretly, I won't tell anyone else. You didn't do anything to that poor old man."
Deadpool smiled strangely: "No comment."
Damn, now the relationship between Deadpool and Janice has become a "Schrödinger's Cat"-like state. Before Deadpool tells everyone the truth, there are two possible superpositions of the relationship between them.
This may become a mystery that will never be solved.
