Ayun went back to her room to read the medical books. Chu Xin was still sitting there, the shadow in her heart not dissipating for a long time.
Facing the fear of death and facing the disappointment of his former lover, these two emotions have always been entangled in his heart and have never dissipated.
Therefore, Qianqian's death should have been directed and performed by Xiao Zhi and others. It was precisely because of this scene that King Xuan took the blame, so he really wanted to vent his anger and kill someone.
When did Xiao Zhi's heart become so cruel? Didn't Qianqian and the two of them save Du together in Wan County?
Haven't you lived in the palace for so long? Don't you have any feelings at all? Don't I have such a trace of hesitation when I make a move?
In silence, I suddenly thought of the bet that Chu Yi once talked about. At that time, I still couldn't figure out what it meant, but now I suddenly figured it out.
So I lost the bet. I thought my position in Xiao Zhi's heart was very important. In fact, it was nothing more than that. I couldn't even show preference in small things. Why did I dare to expect that I would be on my side in big things?
Maybe after she really figured it out, she wouldn't worry about it anymore. She would drink medicine on time every day. Qiao Xia helped her walk a circle or two. After the crutches were ready, she could walk slowly alone.
I had a lot of time every day and didn't know what to do, so I often went to Ayun's room to take the book and read it slowly. As I looked at it, I also felt that this medical skill was quite interesting.
Some herbs can heal people, but they can also kill people, it just depends on how they are used.
"Ayun, can you tell me what happened in Northern Qi?"
Chu Xin was reading a book that day, but she couldn't read it because her mind was elsewhere.
"Northern Qi?" Ayun was preparing the medicinal materials, and after a while, "King Xiang of the Northern Qi had a doting concubine named Shen Minghui. I heard that she was also a rich lady, but for some reason she became the concubine, but that Xiang Is the princess going to be angry to death?"
Ayun used her brain a little and knew what Chu Xin wanted to ask, so she told everything she knew. She realized that what happened at the beginning was actually a fight between the back house.
Princess Xiang might be the culprit, so she was quite gloating at the moment.
"I see."
Chu Xin suddenly laughed to herself. Without a side wife, couldn't she still get another one?
As for Chu Yi, she had once vowed to herself that she would be a generous wife if she didn't mind having other women around her husband. Now let's see if she can be generous. ?
Just as Chu Xin thought, Chu Yi was completely defeated by her once naive thoughts.
I used to think one thing, but now I do another thing. When I really face it, I realize that things are not like this at all, and they will only go against what I thought.
I originally thought that she would be a very generous person and would never mind those things in the backyard, but I didn't expect that one after another would really make people feel very upset.
In the past, when facing Chu Xin, she could suppress him easily, but now when facing Shen Minghui, she really couldn't beat him or scold him. Her father was a high-ranking official in Beiqi. If we really want to talk about it, she didn't even do it here in Beiqi. there is nothing.
Sometimes when faced with Shen Minghui's strange aura, he suddenly feels powerless, and feels that living like this is so boring, and when will it end.
Just like how Shen Minghui was dealt with this time, what if another one comes? If she comes again in the future, will she kill all the women in the world?
"Where has your highness gone?"
Chu Yi was sitting in front of the dressing table getting dressed, wearing all kinds of beautiful hairpins on her head, just thinking about dressing herself up beautifully.
"Your Highness went to Mrs. Hui's place."
After Yuexiang came back from inquiring about the information, it was hard to say it. She guessed that after saying this, Chu Yi would definitely be angry.
Sure enough, after hearing the news, he immediately threw the hosta in his hand to the ground, and the hosta was immediately smashed to pieces.
"It's this bitch again!"
Chu Yi looked at herself in the bronze mirror and her face had become ferocious. Sometimes even she looked a little scared.
Those eyes have changed, and the look inside them has become like that of her mother, full of deep hatred and helplessness.
Does every woman become like this after getting married? She wants her husband's love but can't get it, so she can only pour all her hatred on other women. What's the point of hating her?
"I once didn't understand why my mother would react so strongly to Mei Zhu's appearance. I thought she was just a prettier woman. What kind of threat could she pose? Can she really replace my mother's position?
But now I suddenly understand that my mother can't swallow that breath. She feels aggrieved all the time. When she wakes up suddenly at night, she wonders why she is so aggrieved.
I once thought about being a generous wife, never living like my mother, and never resenting my husband’s other women, but I was wrong, I simply couldn’t do it!
Because I am also a human being, I also have seven emotions and six desires. I can also be resentful and jealous. The person I hated most in the past is gone, and now there is another Shen Minghui. Seeing her holding her head high in front of me made me feel disgusted, but I could only bear to swallow it! "
Chu Yi looked at herself in the mirror and said word by word. She felt that her life after getting married seemed not to be very good. After comparing it, she realized how happy she was when she was a princess in the Chu Palace!
I was so carefree at that time, and there were no such inexplicable worries at all. Sometimes I even foolishly thought that my mother had gone too far in some things.
But now that I have reached this position, I find that I have gradually become like my mother, always feeling unhappy, always feeling aggrieved, and always unable to help but resent.
Yes, she is a duplicitous person. At first, she said her words so nicely that she could tolerate her husband having another woman, but after the real experience, she couldn't tolerate it.
"You always advise me to endure it, and you always say that these things are not important at all, but why are they not important? He makes me feel uncomfortable all the time. I don't even want to eat or sleep well.
When Chu Xin died, I even hit the wall and committed suicide to repay it, but Xiao Zhi still hated me and was still angry with me. I knew that he didn't like that Shen Minghui at all, just to make me angry! "
As he spoke, his eyes became red. What does it feel like when the thing you were most afraid of finally happened?
What Chu Yi was most afraid of was that she would become like her mother, but she didn't expect that she would eventually become like this.
Always worried about gains and losses, unable to grasp the heart of her husband, always facing one woman after another, even though it is clear that the fault does not lie with those women at all.
"The imperial concubine was like this once, but later she looked away on her own. I believe the princess will be able to look away as well."
Yuexiang said distressedly, she has been with the imperial concubine for so many years, what things have she not seen?
The princess is still too young to take these feelings so seriously. Doesn't Chu Xin also take feelings to be so important? What will happen to her now?
"No, no," Chu Yi cried and shook her head.
"I am also a human being, and I also have emotions and desires. I also want to be deeply in love with my husband. I don't want to always face his resentment. Why can't I redeem it? At the beginning, I had already thought about hitting the wall and committing suicide. I wanted to repay him. , why doesn’t he forgive me yet?”
In fact, this is what makes Chu Yi really despair. When he hit the wall, he didn't fake it at all. He knocked a hole in his head, and now there are still marks on his head.
It was true that she did something wrong back then, and she was responsible for half of Chu Xin's death, but didn't she repay it? Wasn't this enough? Can't she still see her guilty heart?
No matter what, she was a legitimate couple, and she was the only mistress of the palace, but why couldn't she get what she really wanted?
"The princess shouldn't hurt herself like this. If the empress knows about it, she will really feel distressed. Hasn't the princess understood it yet? Your Highness didn't care about Chu Xin that much, so how can he expect to care about you too? ?”
Talking about love is a very ridiculous thing. This is the experience gained from serving the imperial concubine for so many years.
Even if the imperial concubine was once so persistent, she would look away, so the princess would eventually figure it out.
"You go out and leave me alone for a while. I just feel very tired and don't want to say anything."
Chu Yi got up and walked to the window, breathing in the fresh air outside the window. In fact, she was dressed very beautifully today, but no one seemed to come to see her.
This is because knowing that Xiao Zhi was staying in the house today, I wanted to dress up beautifully and have a good talk with him, but unexpectedly I went to Shen Minghui's place again.
Shen Minghui was indeed beautiful, but she felt keenly that Xiao Zhi had no feelings for her, and was just pretending to make herself angry.
The only person Xiao Zhi had such feelings for was Chu Xin, but now she is dead and will never appear again!
"Sister, you are dead. I used to hate you so much, but now that you are really dead, I feel like you are not very happy. Will you laugh at me now in heaven?
Even Shen Minghui can't fight anymore. One after another comes. Do you want to watch me keep fighting like this and watch me become the person I least want to be? "
Chu Yi stood by the window and looked up at the sky. The weather today was very good and sunny. Just like that day, the sun rose early, and the sun would shine warmly on the earth.
"It's a pity that your body has never been found. Who knows how many pieces it broke and where it fell? If we really want to talk about it, you are much worse off than me. The price you have to pay is your own life, and I will never I will pay such a price, and this is where I can win!”
After finishing speaking, Chu Yi smiled.
People are different after all. Although she and Chu Xin are both princesses, they are still different.
Chu Xin had no way out. If she made the wrong choice, she would have to pay the price. The price she paid was her own life.
