Tao Ruolin couldn't hold back her tears, nor could she hold back her crying.
The sobbing turned into crying. Tao Ruolin, who had always been smiling in the past, was as helpless as a child, hugging Chu Qing tightly, her nails even wanting to pierce Chu Qing's fox fur.
Tao Ruolin never thought that parting would be so unforgettable.
A quarter of an hour ago, she came here, sitting on the carriage, her mind was in a trance, her heart was very calm, as calm as numb, she couldn't even feel the slightest emotion.
She always felt that all this was a dream, not reality.
But when Bihua knocked on the car door and said that Mr. Chu had arrived, tears instantly burst out of her eyes. Only then did Tao Ruolin come back to her senses. Chu Qing was leaving, leaving the capital and herself.
Tao Ruolin rarely goes to Beijing, and even spends a handful of time with Chu Qing. Most of the time, she spends time in Zhuangzi, occasionally goes to Tao Mansion, and recently she lives in the academy.
She rarely goes to see Chu Qing because she feels that Chu Qing is very close to her. She can see him at any time if she wants to.
It is precisely because he knows that he can see Chu Qing at any time, but it is rare.
But at this moment, after knowing that she could not see Chu Qing at any time, she realized that this was reality, a reality that must be accepted, not a dream.
At this moment, she blamed herself for why she had mentioned Chu Qing's promise to Feng Luoyuan to go to the border without authorization.
She is a smart woman, and she knows that even if she doesn't speak, Chu Qing will agree to Feng Luo.
This is a fact that will definitely happen, but at this moment, Tao Ruolin is fantasizing about unrealistic things.
If it had been him who hadn't spoken, if it had been Chu Qing, he wouldn't have agreed to Feng Luo, and he wouldn't have been separated from Chu Qing.
Tao Ruolin has never blamed herself for anything, not even a single thing.
But now holding Chu Qing in her arms, Tao Ruolin kept blaming herself for everything.
I blame myself for not cherishing her, I blame myself for not spending enough time with Chu Qing every day, I blame myself for not marrying Chu Qing, I blame myself for not having the heart to go to the border with Chu Qing.
Tao Ruolin's heart was as solid as a rock.
Even though she was extremely reluctant to let go, she couldn't go to the border with him because she had to protect everything in the capital for Chu Qing. Apart from herself, she didn't trust anyone to protect everything Chu Qing had created.
But Tao Ruolin, whose heart was as solid as a rock, was shaken at this moment. She bit her lips tightly, holding back her tears and her desire to say these words about going to the border with her.
"I don't know when I became inseparable from you, and I never thought you would leave."
Tao Ruolin still buried her head in Chu Qing's arms, and every word was accompanied by a tear.
"Before I met you, I thought I could never meet someone like you."
"After meeting you, I knew that I would never meet someone like you again."
"The time we spent together was very little, really very little, not enough, not enough for me to remember and miss myself alone."
"When you come back, you have to carry me on your back. Carry me wherever you go and never leave me."
"You are the stupidest person I have ever seen. I miss you and will smile when I see you."
"You are also the stupidest man I have ever seen. You always seek your own death."
"I am the smartest woman I have ever met because I met you."
"I am the stupidest person I have ever met because I don't want to leave you."
Tao Ruolin raised her head and smiled again, but this smile did not have those cunning and bright eyes, which were full of sadness.
"In Tao's village, someone tells a story. You and I in the story are knights and gods and gods. We are very happy in the story. When we come back, we will listen to it together."
Chu Qing nodded. He would listen. After listening, he would let the farmers tell more stories.
"You said that in this world, there are bumps every step of the way. You never know when the bumps under your feet will appear." Tao Ruolin hugged Chu Qing's neck, and her eyes regained some of their former look: "Just Just like I never know which man will say he's in love with me beside the gravel by the stream, let alone when I will fall in love."
Chu Qing still nodded.
"You ask me why I always smile, because you can't see me when I'm not smiling, because I don't want to laugh without you, and I can only smile when I see you."
Chu Qing still nodded, constantly and slowly.
"You know, I am always very good at judging people. When I was by the stream, I saw through you. I knew at the first glance that you would be mine for the rest of my life, right? I judge people. It’s still pretty accurate, right?”
Chu Qing still nodded and kept nodding.
"I have never liked any other man, except you, Chu Qing. You are the first one who makes me attracted. I am afraid that if I do not do well, you will feel that being attracted by me is nothing more than this." , don’t think so, okay?”
Chu Qing began to shake his head and wipe the tears from Tao Ruolin's face.
"No one knows how much I like you. Only Bihua knows. Because when I open my mouth or shut up, it's all you. You have to believe me. If you don't believe me, just ask Bihua."
"Go to the border, come back, marry me again, and finally grow old together."
Tao Ruolin buried her face tightly in Chu Qing's arms again, hugged him tightly, and gradually became quieter, stopped crying, and seemed to be sleeping.
This is what Tao Ruolin wants. She doesn't need Chu Qing to change anything, because she will adapt to Chu Qing who doesn't need to change, as long as she changes.
Two people are like this. Maybe they won't be together every day or see each other day and night, but they like each other. Unknowingly, suddenly, when parting comes, they realize how unknowingly and suddenly they are. It breaks my heart.
The two of them hugged each other tightly, feeling each other in their arms.
Acquaintance, knowing each other, and falling in love are like meteors passing by in the middle of the night. There is no need to sit all night, no need to waste time waiting, all one has to do is rush over and sit on the grass, breathing heavily, in a hurry, just as the meteor is passing by. In the night sky, I happened to look up at this scene. Not too early, not too late, just right. It was late, but not too late.
You don’t need to be knowledgeable or have a kitchen. These are the standards of the world and the standards of love. They are just right. I don’t need your kitchen and you don’t need my erudition. I am your standard and you are. The moment my standards met, everything was doomed.
Fu San's voice sounded softly.
"Master, they are here, it's time to leave."
Suddenly, Chu Qing felt some pain in his waist. Tao Ruolin's delicate body burst out with incomprehensible strength, and she hugged her tighter, as if she was afraid that Chu Qing would disappear out of thin air in the next second.
"I love you forever."
Apart from saying he remembered, Chu Qing only said these seven words.
Tao Ruolin gradually let go of her hands, very slowly, slowly, as if still.
Like a fish that landed on the beach, lacking oxygen and slowly becoming unable to breathe, Tao Ruolin's hands dropped down.
"Remember, I love you forever."
Repeating these seven words again, Chu Qing bit his lip, pushed open the car door, and walked into the wind and snow.
In the distance, I don’t know when, there were already people waiting to see him off.
