The fact is just as Hashimoto Nanami guessed, Shiraishi Mai is simply absent-minded now and has almost no idea what happened just now.
At this moment, her whole body seemed to be at war between heaven and man, and she was caught in an unprecedented struggle.
Everything I overheard in the cabin that night came to my mind now, and my mood was full of mixed emotions, making it difficult to control myself. The shock and anger when he learned about the relationship between the other party and Nanamin, the betrayal and sadness that he had never noticed, the sadness and reluctance of knowing that the other party was likely to leave, and the nervousness and confusion when the matter was about to happen.
All kinds of emotions were intertwined together, and the mental torture these days had made the girl feel exhausted. As time passed, a voice seemed to come out from deep inside her heart, laughing loudly at her for putting herself in such a bad situation. Embarrassed, thinking about it was extremely painful, but this matter obviously had nothing to do with her at all? Why bother worrying about others——
Yes, this matter obviously has nothing to do with me, so why should I be so nervous?
As if a knot in her heart had been opened, the girl was suddenly stunned and her mind was shaken.
The one we really need to care about, the one we should really worry about, shouldn't be Nanamin, right? They are... that kind of relationship. In the final analysis, what does all this have to do with me...
When she thought of this, the girl couldn't help but feel a little sore in her heart, and she couldn't help but bite the corner of her mouth.
The voice deep inside became more and more arrogant, laughing loudly and tempting: "That's right! That's it! You should pretend you don't know anything! Just let them solve their own problems, you If you worry too much, people may not appreciate it——"
"How can you say that!"
However, at this moment, another voice sounded faintly in his ears, saying anxiously: "Nanamin is your most important friend! Such a big thing is happening to her now, how can you stand by and watch? Have you forgotten your past? Have you made up your mind? You have to stop her from making a big mistake!"
Nana Min...
As soon as she heard the name, Shiraishi Mai's eyes suddenly brightened up again, but the next moment the first voice was mocking coldly again.
"Hahahaha! Stop joking! Even if you want to, what can you do? He will announce the news soon. When the time comes, you still have to leave. Nanamin might also follow. You can do anything now No, I can only stand by and watch!"
As soon as the thought came out, the girl suddenly felt weak again. That's right, what can I do now? The time has been approaching. I have been hesitating and suffering for so long, but I have never come up with any suitable solution. I don't even have the courage to speak out. Now, everything is too late——
"No! It's not too late at all. The most important thing is whether you did it! If you really pretended not to know anything, pretended to be a camel and buried your head in the sand, do you think you would regret it afterwards? ?Can you feel complacent in your heart? By that time, it will be really too late——"
The voice in her ears became more and more anxious, as if she was worried that she was really in such a state of despair.
Mai Shiraishi's eyes struggled, her head lowered lower and lower as she sat in her seat, her nails seemed to be digging into her palms, but the voice in her head snorted and sneered: "Nanamin, Nanamin, you can only use Nanamin as a Excuse! Are you saying that the reason why you have been hesitating until now is just because of Nanamin? Don't lie to yourself! "
"What are you talking about?"
"What nonsense? Isn't this the truth? Since you didn't want Nanamin to make mistakes, you should have just rushed out that night. Otherwise, you would have had time to confess later. Why didn't you do anything? Isn't it because of you? Are you feeling guilty? Or is it because of other reasons——"
"Liar!"
"Then please explain, why did you do this? And why are you still hesitating now? After you know the truth, shouldn't you be angry? Shouldn't you be angry? Why are you doing nothing?"
"I-I'm worried about hurting Nanamin, can't I?"
...
For a time, the two voices in her heart seemed to have turned into two personalities, constantly arguing and arguing, which made her have a headache and her brows became more and more frowning.
The sounds of the selections that were still being announced in the room seemed to drift further and further away, becoming extremely blurry. Only a few extremely slow syllables could be heard faintly, as if they had been slowed down dozens of times. In a tired and struggling mood, Shiraishi Mai closed her eyes and frowned. A layer of mist seemed to appear in front of her eyes. Whether it was the sound or the picture, everything was hidden in this mist and could not be seen or heard.
I don’t know how much time passed, but suddenly, the original voice let out a sharp laugh and said loudly: "I understand! You actually like that guy, right?"
"ah!"
Like a bolt of lightning piercing the fog, and also the girl herself in the fog, Shiraishi Mai felt her whole body tremble momentarily, her eyes suddenly opened, her face turned white.
In her mind, the figure and face of a certain guy, and even every move, word and deed in her daily memory became more and more clear at this moment, as clear as if they were vividly appearing in front of her eyes, making her feel powerless. , unable to move.
Shock, confusion, surprise, shyness, sorrow, disbelief...all kinds of emotions came to her heart again, as if a raging wave had thrown her up high, and then fell down along with the gravity, and the feeling of weightlessness was like being submerged in the sea. She felt like she couldn't breathe.
The anxious voice before became extremely weak, and he was still struggling feebly: "Nonsense! How could I like him? That guy is so hateful, he usually makes fun of me, and he also attacks Nanamin. I should have hated him to death a long time ago. He’s the right one—”
"Then why don't you have any hatred at all? You didn't stand up that night and took Nanamin away... Oh~ I understand, you didn't dare to stand up because you also fell in love with him. Right? Not only are you worried that you won’t be able to face Nanamin after confessing, but you are also worried that he will really leave, so you have been struggling with it until now! Right? "
The voice at the beginning sneered ruthlessly, and the words she spoke were like knives, piercing deeply into the girl's heart, peeling away the deepest and most unwilling thoughts hidden inside.
Mai Shiraishi's face turned pale, and then turned slightly red. The voice was still echoing in her mind. Every word she spoke struck a deep blow at her defenses, shaking her heart. I was swaying and couldn't speak for a long time.
Bits and pieces of getting along with someone come to mind. Some memories are still blurry, and some memories are still clear. But whether it is blurry or clear, recalling it at this moment is full of sourness and sweetness, which is unforgettable.
Like ripples in a calm lake, rippling round and round, never stopping.
She naturally understood what this meant, and she naturally knew what it meant. The sweetness and shyness of confessing her heart were intertwined with the bitterness and grievances of thinking about the moment she was in now, but it made her feel even more confused and powerless.
What can we do if we understand? It's already... too late——
A cold wind seemed to blow in the crowded room, causing her cold skin to tremble and shiver inside her.
The girl could only continue to lower her head, sit on her seat and hold her arms tightly as if for warmth, silently waiting for the moment to come.
The fog dissipated, and the blurry sounds and images from the outside world gradually recovered. Staff Sayuri Shiraishi's announcement coincided with the announcement of the last member of the second row of Fukugami seats.
"The next selected member, No. 6 is - Ikoma Rina!"
