In the 29th year of the Dark Portal, in the Eastern Continent, within the Kingdom of Stormwind.
"Oster, come down here, your father won't let you marry a goblin."
"Let him establish a written record!!——"
Ordinary Elwynn Forest, an ordinary morning, an ordinary young man forced into a dead end by an arranged marriage with fantasy ethics.
The person who climbed onto the roof of the barn was a thin, honest-looking young man named Oster Brown, the son of a small farmer in South River County. This is the third time this month that he has sought death. The first two were for refusing to join the militia and inheriting the farm.
In the eyes of his neighbors, Riost must be crazy. In this chaotic world, he is not satisfied with his family fortune and wants to be an adventurer all day long. It's the kind of blind job where you work as long as you're paid, murder, set fire, rob and steal, and move around the world.
In recent years, natural disasters in Azeroth have been more frequent than in the past few decades combined. They are either violent storms or severe droughts and insect pests. Yesterday the earthquake collapsed the mine, today the flood broke the dam, and tomorrow there will be a black storm covering the sky. The Kingdom of Stormwind is full of hungry people fleeing famine and rampant bandits.
The Wrynn royal family was powerless to do anything about it. The Northern Expedition had been going on for four years, and the entire kingdom was stuck in the quagmire of Northrend. The domestic economy was in a mess, prices and taxes were soaring, and rebellions continued everywhere. Not long ago, a riot broke out in North Elwynn. The mob beheaded many nobles and set the Stormwind City Prison on fire. After the war ended, there were too many death row prisoners and not enough gallows and guillotines, so the Kingdom's Association of Mages invented the magic electric chair.
Oster just wanted to live a stable life, rejecting all arrangements at home and trying to sneak out every day. Fortunately, his father, Old Brown, was a veteran who had participated in the Second World War. He was still in his sixties and still had a lot of tendons. It was not a problem to take care of his ineffective son, but he did not let him escape even once.
What no one knew was that the real Oster Brown had been attacked and killed by a jackal four months ago while on a delivery trip. The person occupying this body is a time traveler from another world named Wu Lian.
Wu Lian has calmed down from his initial excitement since he died suddenly while working overtime the day before the server was stopped and his soul traveled to the world of Azeroth. In the past four months, he has not been able to find anything special about himself.
Not to mention plug-in cheats, you can't even defeat monsters and upgrade normally. Oster is just an ordinary human farmer, without any magical talent and no knowledge of swordsmanship. For humans in Schwarzenegger's world, their physical strength is weak and their left and right hands are uncoordinated. The trainer looked at him and shook his head, and he couldn't even beat a wild boar. Not to mention a dad who can catch a bear with his bare hands.
What's more terrible is that due to different physical rules, the dream of building a machine to prepare gunpowder was shattered. Magic is too convenient and cheap in this world. Engineering is something that only crazy dwarfs and deceitful goblins can do, and all they produce are unreliable things.
Oster could never forget the disdainful look in his father's eyes when he drove the brand new magic puppet and bulldozed the experimental workshop he had worked so hard to build. The simple structure of a machine driven by magic power could make the likes of Newton and Faraday die of shame.
This world is similar but very different from the game world he is familiar with. Generally speaking, it is a magical medieval world with the name of Azeroth.
In Auster's view, if you are reborn in a different world, especially a world where gods and magic really exist, then it would be better to die directly in the first place if you live your life indifferently.
In the eyes of the villagers and family members, this guy has changed from a well-educated, honest and reliable person to a hopeless lunatic since his accident as a businessman.
For example, he always bounces every step he takes when walking. He never takes the stairs when going downstairs, but jumps directly from the railing. When meeting people, he would say nonsense such as "I have to upgrade and get some equipment." He also stopped farming and delivering goods. Whenever he had time, he would go to the nearby woods to chase wild boars and wild dogs. Whenever he had nothing to do, he would chop at the scarecrow with a wooden sword, shouting "123,321..." while doing so. He believed that anything could be put into his pocket, and he once tried to stuff a horse into a hand-sized cloth bag.
In addition, every time he met someone, he would go up and poke them in the head and chest, even an old lady in his eighties or a man as strong as an ox. While poking, he would say, "Why can't you accept the mission?" He would also run straight into his neighbor's house as if he were in a deserted place, search every cupboard and box under the carpet for murals, and immediately take away anything valuable he found, not letting go of a single copper.
If Old Brown hadn't still had some reputation in the neighborhood, his stupid son would have been beaten to death by the angry crowd.
Old Brown was so worried about his son's condition that he ran away five or six times. Rosen Dewey, the best surgeon in Western Springs, calmly said to Old Brown after Oster poked his bald head hard with his fingers again and stole the entire clinic's bandage rolls, "It's hopeless, go back and find it." Tie it up with a chain."
The family suspected that Oster was possessed by something unclean, and they spent a lot of money to find a village magician to exorcise the demon, but to no avail. After trying to send him to serve as a soldier or stay at home to farm, but failed, and seeing that his stupid son was about to lose money, Old Brown thought about finding a good family to marry him.
It is best to be rich, tolerant, considerate and rich. The goblins who open the magic processing factory in Xiquan are very suitable. They are eager to obtain local household registration and basically do not choose. Moreover, he spent a lot of money on dowry. The stocks that Old Brown had invested in the Stormwind City Foundation were all lost due to the collapse of the Dustwallow Swamp Colonial Development Company. His eldest daughter was also preparing to get married and was eager to get the money for turnover.
The remaining question is how to get Bu Xiaozi to agree to the marriage. I always hear Auster say, "I want to make a lot of money and marry an elf girl." In Old Brown's opinion, goblins and night elves look similar. They both have purple skin, long pointed ears, big eyes, and both have the word "jing" in their names. In addition, I have money myself, so I can get it right in one step.
So he sent his eldest daughter, who had a good relationship with her younger brother, to successfully trick Auster into signing a marriage contract with the "petite elf lady", and also dispelled his concerns with magically enhanced photos.
But the fire cannot be contained in the paper. One day ago, when Auster finally saw the real Gollum-like person at the blind date, who was picking his huge nostrils and disliked the shabby and rustic Brown family, he vomited on the spot. After making a big fuss, he even gave Miss Goblin a big mouthful.
However, under the horrified eyes of the Brown family, the eldest lady, instead of getting angry, had tears of excitement in her eyes;
"No one has ever hit me. Everyone is following my family's money. He is such a unique man, I like him!..."
The eldest lady Goblin said that her husband liked this room the most, so she took off her clothes and got things done on the spot. Because Oster would rather die than never fulfill her wish, she reluctantly left after making an appointment to get married.
Oster tried to escape three times that night, but was caught each time by the eldest daughter who loved her younger brother. Early the next morning, the family's farmhand discovered that Oster had secretly climbed to the top of the rice barn, which was more than ten meters high.
…
"Master, the master has already given in. Just come down. He said that he has prepared the expenses for you. You can go wherever you want. He doesn't care anymore."
"Seriously? I'm not afraid of death. If you lie to others again, I'll jump out of here right away!"
On the barn, Oster wanted to stand up, but because he had been sitting for a long time, his legs and feet were numb. He missed his footing and fell down. At the last moment, he hugged the pillar;
"Help! Come and save me!——"
The onlookers pushed a cart filled with straw. However, people in this world were obviously not very familiar with the rules of physics. Oster finally landed with a crash a few feet away from the cart, making no sound.
"He's not breathing!" "Get the priest quickly!—"
Originally, the nearest church was in the county, and it took a day to get there by horse-drawn carriage. Fortunately, a Delaney priest happened to be passing by nearby and stopped in front of the farm. Hearing the noise, he rushed over and without saying much, leaned over and began to heal Oster's injuries.
This is the first time for many residents to see the draenei. This race with hooves, horns, and a tail has only appeared in Azeroth in recent years. The older generation said that they are similar to the burning people. A certain demon from Legion looks exactly the same. However, the Church of Light has clarified many times, saying that Delaney is a good friend of mankind and has flown here from alien space to spread the Holy Light.
As Delaney guided the divine energy from his hands, Oster was gradually enveloped in golden light. The wounds on his body quickly shrank and disappeared, and he regained his breath after a while.
Everyone cheered, and Old Brown nervously held out a bag of silver coins, saying that if it was not enough, there would be food in the warehouse. The fees charged by the Church of Light have always been expensive, especially for Holy Light spells, which are not affordable by ordinary farmers. But Delaney declined;
"Salvation should never be equated with money," the pastor said. Under everyone's admiring eyes, he left silently with his long staff.
