0365 Historical jokes

Style: Historical Author: Sun Chaser SamuraiWords: 2080Update Time: 24/01/18 04:45:16
Liu Dahai smiled and said: "Back to the master, I was afraid that I would miss the master's business, so I got up and rushed over."

Liu Haojia chuckled and said, "You're quite clever! Okay, let's sit down and eat together. Go find the boss lady and ask for whatever you want to eat."

Liu Dahai agreed and went out to find the proprietress. Then he took a few things and sat down to eat. Liu Haojia saw that he was eating very politely, so he asked, "You look like you have been studying for a few years. Have you really studied?"

Liu Dahai put down his chopsticks and said: "Master, you have good eyesight! The villain did read books when he was a child. The villain's father was a scholar with a bachelor's degree, so the villain studied with his father for several years. But later, the villain's father passed away, and the villain wanted to I wanted to support my mother, so I stopped reading and went out to do things.”

Liu Haojia nodded and said: "So that's it. Talk while eating, don't stop. I think you are quite smart, otherwise you wouldn't be able to learn those barbarian sayings. What barbarian sayings do you speak?"

After receiving the order, Liu Dahai started eating confidently and boldly. While eating, he said: "The little man is best at Portuguese, and he is also good at Spanish. He also speaks Dutch (the Netherlands) quite well. I am also learning English from a sailor recently."

When Liu Haojia heard it, he felt that this guy was really a language genius! Look at the four languages ​​he knows. The Netherlands and England are both rising stars on the sea, and their development is now gaining momentum! The Netherlands was once known as the "Sea Coachman"! Once dominated the entire ocean! Not to mention England, the famous "Empire on which the Sun Never Sets"!

As for Portugal and Spain, it’s even better! Both countries were once overlords of the ocean! They truly kicked off the Age of Discovery! How powerful are these two countries? So powerful that these two countries once divided the earth under the auspices of the Pope!

Since these two countries were both powerful countries at the time, it was inevitable that they would encounter conflicts. Later, due to a series of reasons, the two countries fought off and on for many years. Later, both countries felt that it was not good to continue fighting like this, so under the auspices of the Pope at that time, in 1494, they determined that the meridian 370 leagues west of Cape Verde, that is, near 46°37' west longitude, was the boundary. Spain, the east side belongs to Portugal.

This meridian passes through the midpoint connecting the Cape Verde Islands owned by Portugal and the American lands of Cuba and Hispaniola first discovered by Columbus for Spain. It is basically in line with the results of the two countries' ocean exploration. This treaty establishing each other's colonies was the unprecedented "Treaty of Tordesillas".

At that time, Europeans were still very vague about the geographical survey of the New World. This treaty actually divided the entire world except Europe. It became the first treaty to carve up the earth in human history, and it was well implemented by both parties.

However, through Magellan's circumnavigation, Europeans finally proved through practice that the earth is round, which also means that a single meridian can no longer fulfill the task of carving up the earth, because the territories on both sides are eventually connected. This is exactly what happened: the Spanish and Portuguese fleets, which each circled half the world, met in the Spice Islands, just as the two countries were adjacent to each other on the Iberian Peninsula. This encounter was not romantic. The two countries' ocean-going fleets were at war with each other, and the conflict inevitably broke out on the distant horizon.

Later, in 1529, the two countries signed another "Treaty of Zaragoza" as a continuation of the "Treaty of Tordesillas". In order to ensure fairness, both countries tend to find another meridian facing 46°37' west longitude as the boundary to bisect the earth. Just as the Papal Meridian left Brazil for Portugal, so this meridian left the Philippines for Spain.

After the Treaty of Tordesillas and the Treaty of Zaragoza, the Spanish Empire and the Portuguese Empire met at the end of the world and completed the feat of cutting the earth for the first time in human history. As the first global colonial empires in human history, Portugal and Spain's illustrious martial arts efforts to cut the earth were unprecedented!

But what is even more legendary is yet to come: these two empires, each occupying half of the earth, actually merged... He actually merged! This triggered a series of stories, which I won’t repeat here.

But what’s even more interesting is that Spain once planned to conquer the Ming Dynasty! Spain in the 16th century had already created many colonial miracles—it took 300 people to conquer Mexico and 100 people to conquer the Incas. So they thought: With 60 outstanding soldiers, they can conquer the Ming Dynasty!

At that time, the Spanish Armada was roaming the sea, and the country's self-confidence was super-inflated. In Asia, Portugal captured Malacca and Spain easily conquered the Philippines. The main purpose of Spain occupying the Philippines was to conquer China!

To this end, the Spaniards conducted a detailed inspection of China and finally concluded that: (1) China is vast and rich in resources, (2) like the Native Americans, the people here are cowardly and incompetent, (3) the military's combat effectiveness is vulnerable, ( 4) With a large population, a large amount of wealth will be created in the future, etc.

On January 11, 1574, the colonist Recker wrote to the king saying: If His Majesty is willing to make arrangements, with less than 60 excellent Spanish soldiers, they (referring to the Chinese) can be conquered and suppressed.

Two years later, on June 2, 1576, Sander, the Spanish Governor in the Philippines, wrote to the king: This undertaking (referring to the conquest of China) is easy to implement and the cost is low. The implication is that the government's investment in China is very small, but the benefits are very large.

However, Sander is a little more sensible. He is not so exaggerated that he only needs 60 people. He made a detailed plan, and his main strategy was to conquer one province first, and then emphasize that "it would be enough to conquer the whole country."

His plan to invade China is as follows: (1) The expedition requires 4,000 to 6,000 men, and the ordnance must be complete; (2) An army of 2,000 to 3,000 men is enough to occupy a province; (3) Use the ports and fleets in the occupied areas , formed the largest army on the sea, and then conquered other provinces.

In April 1586, the Spanish held a congress in Manila and discussed in detail the plan to conquer the Ming Dynasty. In the end, the assembly unanimously agreed, and a letter signed by 51 dignitaries was sent to the King of Spain. The following are the key points of Spain's plan to conquer the Ming Dynasty: (1) The expeditionary force consisted of 10,000 to 12,000 Spanish soldiers, plus 5,000 Japanese, which was enough to conquer the Ming Dynasty! (2) It is best for the Portuguese to participate in the expedition to China, because the Portuguese have experience in this area. (3) Change the past methods of aggression - China's population cannot be reduced. The disappearance of population means the disappearance of wealth. (4) After occupying China, retain the Chinese government to maintain its prosperity and wealth. (5) It is recommended that Spanish citizens marry Chinese women, raise mixed-race offspring, and take charge of China's rule. (6) Establish a large number of school churches to instill Spanish religious culture into the Chinese people. Regardless of whether they are rational or not, I laughed irrationally anyway!