"When they beat you and scold you at will, aren't they afraid of being punished by God?"
he ask me,
I saw on his face that he was clearly angry at the injustice done to me.
I'm really happy to have such a person listening and feeling sorry for me,
The wind at the moment was gentle, but I no longer felt anything.
"No, they won't." I firmly believed in my heart.
After that southerner beat me, I felt completely depressed.
At that moment, I was completely slapped and realized what my situation was in this family.
It's superfluous. People don't want you to come, so you still want to come back shamelessly.
It's funny, I still had hope for this family.
"If you don't want me to stay at home, I'll leave right away."
Then I started to pack my things. I had very few things. Apart from what I brought back, there was almost nothing to pack.
The textbooks I studied in the past were sold to some rag collector long ago.
Anyway, I used to put a lot of things in every corner of my house, but I never found them again.
It can be said that my suitcase when I came here was heavier than it is now.
Before the Chinese New Year, I even thought about buying more things for these 'family members', so that I could have a happier New Year.
Especially tomorrow, I originally wanted to take my brother to the county cinema to watch a New Year movie.
For that movie, a few days before the Chinese New Year, I set my review in my hometown and wanted to book tickets in advance! Ha ha ha ha!
You don’t know, when I was packing my luggage, this family not only didn’t stop me in any way,
That Aunt Zhao even glanced at my box several times, fearing that I would take away something from the house.
I ignored her, thinking in my mind: pretend she doesn’t exist, and I’ll never see her again.
I just wanted to pack it up quickly, because there was always a picture in my mind at this time: "The old southerner named Tong kicked me on the back, grabbed my hair with his hands, and pulled hard." '
That kind of fear has always been in my heart, so much so that I didn’t carefully check if there were any small items I forgot to bring at home.
After getting ready, I looked towards the sofa in the living room.
The whole family was sitting on the sofa watching Yangshi's program "Year After Year".
It makes people feel like they are at home during the New Year.
At this time in previous years, I would also be looking forward to the following gala.
It could have been very warm, but at this moment, my heart is extremely cold.
That kind of coldness is the same as when my mother left this home!
When I walked outside, the bone-chilling cold and darkness made me instinctively feel afraid.
I am a person who is very afraid of ghosts.
When I was a kid, when an old man died in my family, I would burn paper figures and horses, the kind that were covered in white paper and had colorful stickers on them. I thought that was particularly scary.
In the countryside, you know? Fireworks are always allowed.
When I was young, every night on New Year’s Eve, the fireworks and firecrackers would go off all the time.
But in recent years, some villagers have bought houses in the county. In fact, many people dislike the poverty in the county and go to the big cities in the south of the Yangtze River. Once the elderly family members die, they will not come back to celebrate the New Year.
There must be some reason for this or that in our village. Half of the houses were no longer occupied.
Some people feel that there is no lively life here anyway, so they won't come back.
But there are brighter and taller fireworks that light up the village paths from time to time.
Then there was someone’s old dog that kept barking.
Of course, this has nothing to do with me. My home is in the second house at the west end of the village.
As I passed by the closed iron gate of the first eldest family at the entrance of the village,
I walked onto the slightly higher dirt road at the entrance of the village and took a look into the village:
How familiar my hometown is,
I used to love you so much.
The feeling of leaving on this New Year's Eve, the most important time for reunion, is really...!
I turned around and looked outside the village. There was almost no light at all!
That kind of darkness is so thorough that if you don't turn on your phone light, you really can't see anything.
I stood outside the courtyard wall on the right side of my eldest father's house, on a slope more than one meter higher than the road in the village. I turned on the light on my mobile phone and shined it into his house. It was completely dark inside.
I was really worried that something terrible would come out of his window sill,
Especially when I think of the eldest father’s ranking on the wall table at the entrance of his family!
That fear comes from the inside out.
At this time, I thought of something and quickly checked the battery:
37%.
I really don’t know how bad things are for me!
Because my phone has fast charging, I don’t check how it is used when I’m at home.
This moment made me worried to death.
In this remote, small village, nine miles away from town, there is no place where I can charge my batteries! ?
The school in my hometown is very poor. Let alone studying here to get into college, if you graduate from junior high school and go to a technical secondary school, you have to be among the top in the class.
Therefore, anyone who cares about their children will not let their children study here.
Of course, when I started studying in the county in the fifth grade of elementary school, it was not because of my 'biological father', but because of my grandfather who was still alive at the time.
The person I was closest to when I was young was also the old man who was the best to me.
His grave is in a field in the town I'm about to visit.
At this time, I thought of that kind old man. Every time I came back from school during the winter and summer vacations, he would get the news of my return from the phone and would wait for me at the entrance of the village.
So when I come back, I can always see him,
I could feel that every time he came back, he would be more stooped than the last time. In the end, he had to rely on crutches to barely support his old figure.
He is my biggest motivation to come back!
It’s also my biggest nostalgia! ! !
Now that he is gone, this family no longer has anything to do with me.
"You still ask me for money? I'll go next door to you."
I scolded the entire family for the injustice they had done to me.
I'm walking in darkness now, and it so easily swallows up all the space except for the small handful of light that shines on the dirt with my phone!
Many years ago, the old man once held my little hand, and the surroundings were so dark. I always felt that the flashlight in his hand was very bright.
No matter how dark it is around me, I'm not afraid.
When I think of the old man who brought me so much warmth and the beautiful childhood scenes a long time ago,
I felt extremely uncomfortable, and tears were dripping from my chin like water.
I could clearly feel it streaking across my cheeks one after another.
"I'm Tong Qingyan!"
I said this with great sadness in my heart.
I can clearly feel the goosebumps on my back caused by fear.
I shouted to myself over and over again in my heart: "Grandpa, protect me. Make sure your granddaughter survives tonight!"
I was really scared. That fear even made me forget about that vicious family.
If that 'father' realizes that something bad might happen to me as a girl out there, and calls me home,
I will definitely be deeply moved and maybe forgive him.
But how is this possible!
Didn't happen either!
I know that this is when my whole body and mind are plunged into extreme fear and tension, and I urgently need to find a breakthrough.
That's just wishful thinking on my part.
From this moment, the evil that the world has treated me is vividly and exquisitely displayed in front of me.
If I have a chance I will take revenge,
But when I was gritting my teeth just a moment ago and expressing my resentment towards the world,
I turned my face and looked around. All around me was a dark space.
When the light of my mobile phone shines to the side,
Unique to this season, there is farmland that is lifeless at all, and its crop fields that have fallen off.
A tomb was erected so abruptly on another farmland near the field stems on this side.
I don't know which company this belongs to, but there are brightly colored wreaths, white paper circles, and paper money on it.
It’s really easy for me to think of scary things.
At this moment, those fears poured into my heart like a tide,
I found that my body was so stiff that I couldn't even turn my head back normally.
All my eyes and attention rested on that tomb,
I have an idea in my heart at this moment, and it is getting stronger and stronger: I want to go to that tomb and kowtow to it.
But the only bit of reason I have is telling me: 'I can't go. If I go, it will probably be the end of me.' '
After reading books for so many years, I feel that they are all fake, and they are probably all illusions caused by inner fear.
But when the whole body was covered in goosebumps and numbness was extremely severe,
My front suddenly became empty, and my whole body instantly fell over.
I feel like I don't belong to me at this moment.
'This is a dream, it's all illusion. '
My condition at the moment is very bad and I really want to die.
"do you know?"
"If you gave me a knife, I would just rub it on my neck."
At this moment, Shen Jie could clearly feel the despair and pain from her expression and words.
