The sound of waves coming from all directions suddenly became louder, and Yucheng's eyes felt as dim as a dark sea. I tried hard to find a breakthrough, but I couldn't find it.
"I usually prefer watching comedies and realistic dramas. When I want to cry but have nothing to use as an excuse, I watch tragic dramas. I burst into tears while watching dramas, and my mother and sister thought I was obsessed. Woolen cloth."
Yucheng suffered for a while and then drove the car into the parking lot again. Suddenly driving from a bright place into a dark place, Yu Cheng's eyes were a little confused. He felt it was difficult to move and leaned heavily on the driver's seat.
"Because I don't want my emotions to be a burden to them. I'm the kind of person who would rather sacrifice myself and want my family to live a better life."
When Chengmei responded seriously to Mingyao's question, a sad and bitter smile flashed across her lips. Thinking of this, Yu Cheng was so flustered that he restarted the car with a heavy heart, but there was no sign of the car leaving...
"Hey! Why did mom call so late? No! You said I didn't have any blind dates."
As soon as Yucheng got off the elevator, he saw Ming Yao hurriedly walking towards here holding a phone not far away. Yucheng noticed that he was carrying a briefcase and wanted to ask him where he was going, but Mingyao looked at Yucheng with sharp and cold eyes, and Yucheng had to touch his lips in embarrassment.
"Is it Brother Ke Mian? Mom, please listen to my explanation. Brother Ke Mian must have misunderstood. I really came to listen to the class today.", "Oh! No, it's not what you thought at all." Mom, please listen to my explanation." After Ming Yao said these two sentences, he disappeared around the corner of the tavern.
Unknowingly, Yucheng had approached Chengmei, and through her fair and clear face, Yucheng could vaguely see his former wife who liked to raise a hand towards him, with a bright smile on her face. Yucheng took a few quick breaths and sat down slowly.
"It turns out that was the time when you were the most helpless, the most lonely, and the most in need of my comfort."
Yucheng moved his face closer to Chengmei, and in his mind she stared at him angrily again. Yucheng knew that she was really angry, but he forgot that the original Chengmei was also a bright and lively girl. After eating her own ice cream in big gulps, she would rudely snatch away Yucheng's half-eaten ice cream. She would also squat next to Yucheng who had just finished doing push-ups and continuously stretch her arms, so Yucheng could clearly see her tight and playful muscles. Her voice was always as fresh and sweet as the waves at night. Thinking of this, Yucheng's head ached as if he was lacking oxygen. He had no choice but to fold his hands together like a parasol and sit quietly in the shadows.
"I am exhausted from the heavy work, and I always feel at ease that I am the most miserable person in the world. Oh, I can't even protect myself, so you should take care of all the things at home by yourself."
Yucheng squinted his silver-white eyes and once again looked at the extremely busy Chengmei in his mind who was constantly running between housework and children.
"I have clearly seen those sad scenes, but I still pretended not to know and pushed away your eager hand. The door closed again and again, and the light gradually disappeared from my eyes when I looked at you. ”
"So am I the one who caused everything?!"
Thinking of this, Yu Cheng's face became paler and paler, and finally his throat started to choke with sobs following the trembling finger...
The diary in my mind turned back to the past again. That day was also on a sparkling seaside. Chengmei swam very far away, but when Yucheng raised his hand suddenly, he swam back quickly. Finally ashore, Chengmei ran towards Yucheng excitedly. Yucheng remembered her neat teeth, and she always looked so confident and cute when she ran around with a smile.
"Will you regret marrying me?"
Although there was an impulse in his heart, Yucheng did not have the courage to hold Chengmei's hand. On the contrary, Chengmei gave Yucheng a shy look, but her smile remained so pure and sweet.
"How could I regret it? I obviously married the person I love the most."
A trace of nervousness began to appear in Yucheng's eyes, and Chengmei asked for the last time as if to confirm.
"Then will you? Maybe there will be a day when you deliberately avoid me? But I still don't mind. I will chase after you until you respond to me with the same love."
Chengmei excitedly muttered, pushed, and even grabbed Yucheng's neck to pull their faces closer and closer in the water, but she didn't know that the worry in Yucheng's eyes far outweighed the longing for marriage. . "Although we surfaced with our eyes on each other, deliberately distancing ourselves from each other for fear of being seen by people we knew, our legs were entangled under the invisible water. Such a happy moment appeared in The honeymoon period, I don’t want to but it will always stop there.”
"You are depressed and aggrieved. Do you want to have a private space? But I surround my two children every day and worry about the whole family eating, drinking, and eating. In these years, I have no friends, no social interaction, and no hobbies of my own. How dare you He also told me to be quieter. Zheng Yucheng, do you know that I no longer have any expectations and passion for life?! The only time I can talk to you at the end of the day is between the time you get off work and the time you go to bed. When I was young, do you still want me to shut up? I don’t understand why there is a place in this house that I can never go to? Do you know that your appearance makes me feel that we are not husband and wife, but roommates?!"
"I remember that was the first time Chengmei and I had a fight. She was so angry that she almost jumped up. I really wanted to slap her, but I held back. Because up to that day, no one had entered the complex without my consent. Although there is nothing special, in my opinion, it is the spiritual castle that I want to protect throughout my life. I don’t want anyone to enter, that is where I vent my emotions, and it is also the most important part of my life.”
"I don't let you drink for your own good. Is it also my fault for not letting you throw away the garbage? Do you know that if you just throw it away, I have to clean it for a long time. Just taking care of two children is enough to make me exhausted. Come on, have you ever helped me with anything? Whether it’s housework or children, have you ever taken the initiative to take care of it?! So, don’t tell me anymore about taking care of your emotions.”
Chengmei's anger is always so hasty, and Yucheng always looks unprepared. Perhaps he had seen his wife look like a monster when she was angry, so Yucheng just stood there without daring to speak. Over time, silence gradually evolved into indifference. The coldest place in the world is not the North and South Poles, but home.
"Li Chengmei, can you be a little more sentimental? Don't let me, a person in my early 30s, feel that I am the same age as my parents. The clothes I bought for you are all deformed. Every time I turn off the light, I feel sleepy. What do you think? You can do whatever you want. And can you please stop talking about household chores all the time. I'm about to have a neurasthenia. What I face at work every day is endless nagging. I feel like there is no difference between going home and going to jail. , every day is a repeat of the last nightmare.”
That day Yucheng always looked at Chengmei knowing that he was in the wrong, his voice was cold and difficult.
"Oh, but all my time and energy are given to you, your parents and children. My life is always only about children and housework. When chatting with my classmates, I realized that I don't even have myself. I admit that in terms of finance You have given a lot, but what about me, am I not living like a walking zombie?! Don’t I want to be more refined? To put it bluntly, don’t you just yearn for freshness when you see the sweetness of others? I can help you, You disappear immediately!"
Seungmi raised her fist as if to hit someone, but it didn't come down as hard as expected. The moment Yucheng opened his eyes in panic, Chengmei laughed out of her mind and took a few steps back. "If I had spoken softly from the beginning, my wife would have become more serious." Because of this foresight, Yucheng did not give her such a chance, but now it seems that he has never made any concessions to himself. A chance to rekindle feelings.
"It wasn't you who turned into a monster. It was my turning a blind eye that turned you into a monster. From a bright and innocent girl..." Yucheng covered his face. He didn't dare to think about it anymore because he was about to suffocate.
"I'm sorry.", "I'm really sorry.", "It's my fault, it's all my fault..."
Although Chengmei's furious look still lingered in Yucheng's mind, he still gently stroked Chengmei's cold hair with his hand. At this time, Chengmei's eyelids kept moving, and finally she stared at Yucheng quietly like a mermaid emerging from the water.
Yucheng was just as nervous as the boy back then. Although he kept reminding himself to look at her expressionlessly, his heart still beat enthusiastically.
"What's on your hair? It's all white."
Yu Cheng asked confusedly. Seungmei took a deep breath and raised her eyes, maybe she was calculating when the love would stop.
"It's actually naked. I, I took it off for you, that's why.", "I'm so sorry, I was so rude."
Chengmei opened her eyes wide as she faced Yucheng again, and quickly lowered her head silently as if she understood what he was thinking.
"You seem a little drunk today. I'll ask Ming Yao to take you back to the dormitory. I have to leave right away."
Yucheng looked at Chengmei, eager for her to respond, but for some reason, Chengmei just looked at Yucheng with a slightly red face and hesitated to speak.
"Strange, where did this kid go?! I'd better go and help you find him!" In the end, Yucheng had no choice but to look at Chengmei and said firmly and with difficulty.
