Lin Beichen seemed to have fallen into an abyss of time.
He had to face his dying self, the guy who was sinking into death bit by bit like a maggot. If Lin Beichen hadn't seen it with his own eyes, he would have never known that he was in such a mess at that time.
Death is actually not terrible. What is terrible is that a person who was once so strong and arrogant is now as humble and insignificant as an ant, not worth mentioning.
In this case, no matter how great the dream is, it becomes boring and boring, and all pursuits in life are as worthless as dreams.
After falling asleep for only ten minutes, he woke up from what seemed to be a very violent but not very loud interaction.
God showed no mercy to him and only gave him fifteen minutes to breathe.
After waking up, it was endless torture.
When cancer reaches the advanced stage, you don't even know what disease you have because every part of your body is in pain. The pain radiating from the bone marrow is hard to resist and difficult to contend with.
Lin Beichen looked at this scene, which brought back memories that had been long forgotten, and seemed to hurt along with it.
After staying up all day and night, and taking a nap for less than half an hour, he could no longer sweat. He sucked hard on the straw that Yun had prepared long ago, which was connected to the bucket next to him.
He knew very well that such a day would come to him, so he made these preparations when his body could bear it.
However, the situation was more difficult than he expected. There was still water in the bucket, but he did not have enough strength to suck the water into his mouth.
Thirst, pain, hunger, and torture, he could only wait to die slowly.
Fortunately, there is still a TV to accompany him, and the pictures on it are constantly beating. What he can see in his eyes is no longer specific animal images, but colorful blocks of color, dancing along with the sweet music. This is the most beautiful thing in the room.
However, the TV screen trembled for a moment and then suddenly stopped and disappeared.
The whole room fell into a deathly silence and coldness.
Lin Beichen sighed slightly, the Electricity Bureau was so dedicated and did not give him any advantage.
If he had known that such a situation would happen, Lin Beichen would have paid the electricity bill in full even if he went to rob it, so that the last period of his life would not be so miserable.
Without the sound and color of the TV, the world is left with only the desolate breathing sound.
Lin Beichen sat back on the sofa and silently looked at the little body curled up more and more tightly on the bed.
Anger began to spread.
At this moment, Lin Beichen thought of a lot.
The people he had helped, the gains he had given up because of his ideals.
The people he helped should be enjoying their lives at the moment, completely forgetting about him.
If those benefits that he had given up because of his aloofness were kept until now and accumulated, even if they could not cure his disease, they would still allow him to receive the care he deserved in the last days of his life.
Definitely not waiting to die like a pig or a dog like now.
Lin Beichen knew that he was trapped in a whirlpool of anger, and he also knew that he was likely to become possessed again if this continued, but emotions were something that could not be pretended to be as if nothing had happened.
The final result of blindly suppressing anger is not that the anger disappears, but that the anger becomes stronger and stronger and eventually swallows everything.
Therefore, once anger arises, Lin Beichen's approach is not to suppress the anger, but even to allow it to spread.
The competition in this last great calamity is no longer about endurance, but a spiritual confrontation, a competition of wills, and a confrontation between oneself and oneself.
Lin Beichen now understood that the one lying on the bed was his inner demon.
How to overcome the anger and resentment before death is the key to whether he can survive the great catastrophe.
Lin Beichen knew that it was not him who was angry, but the person lying on the bed.
At this moment, Lin Beichen had become an outsider, and he had to eliminate the anger of the person on the bed.
Lin Beichen looked at the poor man on the bed with pity. He could read his hatred for the whole world from his frown!
Lin Beichen sat on the bedside and slowly said, "Do you want to play a game?"
The man on the bed said painfully: "Do you think I'm in the mood to play games?"
Lin Beichen was silent for a moment and said: "Well, to be honest, I really don't know how to forgive you. I remember that when I was lying there like you, I was filled with anger and wished that the whole world would be buried with me."
"I just don't have the power now. If I had the power, I would kill everyone in the world. If there was a button that could turn me into a devil, I would press it now." The voice of the person on the bed He said tremblingly, pulling the quilt hard as he spoke, wrapping himself up like a cocoon.
Lin Beichen looked out the dim window. The lights outside were bright, and countless families were living a beautiful and happy life. The laughter of children could be heard faintly next door. It was the young man who was preparing for the exam. It seemed that he got a good score in the final exam. score.
"If the child does well in the exam, will you be happy for him?" Lin Beichen asked.
"Do I care if he did well in the exam? Does he have anything to do with me? It hurts so much. Now I just feel like they are so noisy and I want to strangle them all to death."
Lin Beichen laughed when he heard this: "You only have the ability to talk. It would be better if you were so cruel. It's a pity that you don't have much future except for being tough-talking. A kind person can sometimes be a loser. , just like you, you are obviously in terrible pain, but you are afraid of disturbing other people's studies and dare not say a word. Call you weak, but you are so cruel to yourself! Call you strong? But you don't even dare to disturb a child. "
"Shut up! I just don't have the strength to scream..."
Lin Beichen was still smiling: "I finally understand one thing. Being obsessed is not scary at all. The so-called inner demons are just a bunch of little trash. You are not a person who can be possessed at all. You don't have the murderous intention, nor the With that determination, even if others fail you, you will not have the heart to do anything to them. You are just a kind-hearted useless person. You have no qualifications to become a demon. A guy like you cannot do anything big, even bad things."
"Shut up, shut up!"
"shut up!"
"If I become stronger again, if my fists still have power, I will punch everyone in this building to death. I must be the most terrifying person in the world."
Lin Beichen got up and walked to the refrigerator. When he opened it, there was still half a birthday cake inside.
Lin Beichen had to celebrate his birthday by himself. The birthday cake had been in the refrigerator for five days and should have gone bad, but it didn't seem to be a big problem.
Lin Beichen took it out, found the spoon with ease, walked to the window, ate the cake and looked out the window.
"The most terrifying person in the world? Is that what I thought at the beginning?"
Some people died, but not completely...
