Winnie left a plate for us for breakfast. There were two bowls of cereal on the tray, next to two glasses of orange juice.
Ben got a cup and swallowed his pills. I grabbed a bowl and sat down in Weenie's squeaky office chair. I don't want to go to that bed.
Ben took his bowl and leaned against the opposite counter. We all ate our cereal in silence. The crunch of chewing filled the air.
"Why did you come into my room?" I asked.
"I heard you crying and screaming," he said. "You're probably having a nightmare. I used to be in trouble like this every night."
"Oh." I looked down at the bowl in my hand.
Ben cleared his throat. I saw him put down his bowl and cross his arms. He stroked his chin with his hand.
"They didn't hurt you, did they?" Ben asked and I shook my head. I put the bowl next to Winnie's computer.
"Do you still have nightmares?" I asked.
"Sometimes, yes," he said. "Not nearly as much as the first time I had surgery."
"Have you told Dr. Philip?"
"No, but she figured it out. If you have, don't tell them."
"Why?"
"They want to believe you'll settle down here. I've been to two of these dinners and they want their theme to be: worship them. They want a respectful and polite subject at their feet."
I rolled my eyes. Another dull pain spread across my temples.
"What does this have to do with telling Winnie about my dream?" I asked.
"We want to get out of here," he said. "That won't happen now. You need to gain privileges from him, and the only way to do that is to make him trust you. If you go against him and tell him you're obsessed with nightmares, that's a waste!"
"It took you three years to leave this house,"
"I can't wait that long."
Let’s get started… “It took me three years
Because I act like an idiot, most of the time. This resulted in me being restrained and sedated throughout the day. "
"I won't be hypocritical."
"If you want to get out of here, that's what you have to do."
The door lock clicked, and I looked back to see a blurry figure coming down the stairs. Philip. Her lips are painted pink and she smiles brightly. Her hair was tied into a low bun. Her lab coat covered her shirt and skirt. "Good morning, you two," she said.
"Good morning, Dr. Philip," Ben said.
"Did you take your medicine? I gave them to Dr. Whinney."
"Yes, I did. Thank you."
Philip glanced at me before walking towards Ben. She put her hand on the counter next to him. She put her glasses on her head and blinked.
"How's Diana doing?" she asked.
“She’s been great,” Ben said. He smiled at me. "I think she'd make a great dinner."
"Really?" asked Philip. "Dr. Whinney told me she had a breakdown this morning."
Ben turned his head to the side and stared at her. My fingers curled into the legs of my pajamas. I couldn't take my eyes off them when they talked about me.
"To be fair, no one really gets up early," Ben said.
Philip took her hands off the counter. She took a deep breath and put her hands into the pockets of her white coat. She pulled out a pair of plastic gloves. "Take off your shirt," she said. "I wanted Diana to see how to act to assess."
Ben's eyes darted to me. He pulled his shirt over his head. Dark splotches above his shirt collar were scattered across his chest. He also has a patch on his ribcage on the other side of his torso. Philip ran his fingers along the jagged edges. I looked away from Ben.
When she asked him to raise his arms and tilt them to one side, he complied. Every time I looked up, Ben's eyes were on me. I tried to look away, but my eyes were trapped on his scales.
Philip looked back at me. She curved her lips and smiled, then turned back to look at Ben.
"Do you really think she's settled?" she asked.
"I'd like to guarantee that," he said.
"I hope so. I miss having you there."
She placed her hands flat on his chest. His eyes fell on her hands. He put his hand on her back and she shuffled a step closer. I bury my face in my knees to hide my disgust
I stayed like that until I heard Philip's heels clicking on the floor.
She grabbed my half bowl of cereal.
"Eat it," said Philip.
"I'm not hungry," I said.
"I don't care." She held the bowl. "Dr. Whinney wants you to eat it all, you have to."
She shook the bowl gently. I spread out and took the bowl. She slipped away without saying goodbye to us.
Ben threw his shirt back. He walked towards me and took the bowl out of my hands.
He sat on the edge of the bed and I spun around in my chair. He popped a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.
"Did you sleep with her?" I asked.
Ben shrugged and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
"Don't shrug," I said. "I can't believe you had sex with her."
"I never said I had," he said.
"Obviously you are. Don't lie to me."
He took a few last bites of my cereal and then put it down.
"Yes," he said. "I had sex with her."
"That's disgusting," I said.
"You're telling me. She's twenty years older than me, and I've never been interested in the whole cougar thing."
"Then why are you doing this?"
“It’s all about playing the game.”
I scoffed, leaning back in my chair.
"It's been three years," I said. "You're not doing very well." "Like I told you, I didn't realize I needed to outsmart them,"
He said. "Geez, you're really disobedient, aren't you?"
"I listen," I said.
"Okay." He pushed himself off the bed. "Let's test it out. Take a shower and come back in half an hour. I'll tell you what you're going to learn."
"OK."
I stood up from Veni's office chair. I followed Ben as he walked down the hall to the showers.
"You know, I'm not going to start sleeping with the Doctor." Ben looked back and smiled.
"I don't want you to do this," he said.
I brushed through my wet hair as I walked through the hallway. The citrus scent of my shower gel lingers in my nose. When I rummaged through the plastic bags on the floor looking for clothes, all I could find were dresses. I chose a denim skirt that was above the knee. I couldn't find any shoes and had to walk barefoot across the cold floor.
Ben is in the main room. He changed into jeans and a hoodie. His dark hair was wet and exposed. He placed a stool on the floor in front of me.
"Let's get ready for this dinner," he said.
