Aunt Xu's words made me feel a little baffled. Why didn't I take good care of myself? So I smiled and said to her, "Aunt Xu, what are you talking about? I'm not good at it." Oh, by the way, why hasn't Meng Dongxue come back yet?
Aunt Xu held my hand and pulled me towards Meng Dongxue's room without saying a word. What, could it be that she was at home all the time but didn't go out, so I didn't notice it? But when I opened the door and saw that the room was clean, there were no pillows or quilts on the bed, and even the sheets were rolled up. The table was originally filled with various books, but they all disappeared at this moment. Meng Dongxue was used to changing her shoes when she entered the house, but there was not even a pair of shoes at the door. The clothes that were originally hung on the wall with nails, as well as the military uniforms, belts, and hats they wore during performances were all gone at this moment. trace.
However, the smell in the room that belonged to Meng Dongxue was still there.
At that moment, I was like a person who turned his back to the cliff and then fell down. All the reference objects around me were quickly moving away from me, which meant that I was falling rapidly. This feeling is very similar to the time when I was a child and I went swimming with Di Baotian beside the sand fishing boat. We always liked to climb to the highest observation deck, and then plunge into the water suddenly, that kind of leap out, and then fall into the water. feeling in. But this time, what I fell into was not the cold river water, but an iceberg covered with sharp ice picks. The moment I landed, each ice pick looked like a sharp sword. From my back, The missing place pierced my body mercilessly. I exclaimed, I panicked, my whole body was bleeding, but I didn't die. The reason I didn't die seemed to be to carefully feel the pain in every inch of my body.
Yes, Meng Dongxue is gone. I finally understood Uncle Zhou’s sigh of shaking his head, and I finally understood why Aunt Xu refused to speak directly, but took me directly to see it. It was all because I couldn't bear to tell me the truth, because no matter how I found out about it at this moment, it was a merciless blow to me.
So at that moment, the night before I left, Meng Dongxue suddenly asked me to go out late at night, and then said many inexplicable words. When I understood it at this moment, my feelings changed. I thought it was tenderness, but in fact, it was a tactful farewell.
I don't hate Meng Dongxue, because in the past two years, she has really comforted my heart and made me feel happy. I also hate Meng Dongxue because she left without saying a word.
Aunt Xu patted me on the back and said, child, you must let it go. Dongxue also has her own unspeakable hardships. We originally advised her to wait until you come back to explain before leaving, at least about your affairs. Fortunately, there is a result. But Dongxue said that she would leave when you were not around. She was afraid that if you were around, she was reluctant to say some things.
I still didn't speak, leaning against the door of Meng Dongxue's room with my shoulders and arms, staring blankly at everything in the room.
Aunt Xu went on to say, not long after you left yesterday morning, Meng Dongxue quietly started packing her luggage. I saw it by accident, and then I realized that the organizational order to return home had been issued more than half a month ago. As long as they have stayed in the village for two years and accumulated enough work points, they are all educated youth under this order to return home. Meng Dongxue is an active member of the production team and has already accumulated enough work points, so her name is among the first batch.
Aunt Xu sighed and said, this kid Dongxue is really tolerant. He kept hiding it from everyone and refused to tell me until I found out. She was also feeling bitter, and she was crying as she collected her things, saying that she couldn't bear to leave us, the old couple, this village, and you, but there was no way, she had to go back, and she couldn't take you back with her.
At that time, Aunt Xu asked Meng Dongxue why she couldn't take me with her. After all, the two young men were in love with each other. If they had waited for me a few more days, they might have left the village together and went directly to our house to say goodbye. I had done a big favor to their family before, and everyone in my family had gotten to know me, so this shouldn't be a difficult thing. But when Aunt Xu asked Meng Dongxue this, she always shook her head and refused to speak.
Aunt Xu told me, child, don’t blame Dongxue. If you do, blame us, the old couple, for not being able to keep her. She has been insisting. She just left this morning, and everyone in our village went to see off these educated youths. If you could come back half a day early, you could stop Meng Dongxue before leaving, but this is a trick of fate. One of you left early and the other came back late, so you missed it.
I suddenly remembered the military trucks with big red flowers that passed by me on the way back to the village during the day. Maybe they were the trucks that sent the educated youth back to their hometowns in glory. Maybe when I was rushing in the direction where Meng Dongxue was, she was sitting in a certain evacuation vehicle and passed me.
Aunt Xu said that relationships cannot be forced, and those of us who get along day and night can see the relationship between the two of you at a glance. Dongxue has her own difficulties, but she can't say it out loud, and she doesn't know how to do it herself. Of course, it is impossible for us to know.
After saying that, Aunt Xu squeezed into Meng Dongxue's room from my side, searched on the empty table, and then opened the drawer of the table. She took out a letter from the drawer, walked to me and handed it to me, saying that this letter was specially left by Dongxue before she left, saying that it was for you. My child, please stay at home. Remember, nothing is impossible. Don’t make yourself miserable. Just promise, okay?
I took the letter and still didn't speak. I just forced a smile and nodded to this rural woman who was not my mother, but cared more about me than my mother. Aunt Xu sighed, touched my head, and then left Meng Dongxue's room. After going out, she specially closed the door for me.
After closing the door, the room became quiet again. There is still the indescribable but faint fragrance of Meng Dongxue in the air. So I sat next to her bed and looked at the rolled up sheets, exposing the brown mattress under the bed, and felt mixed emotions in my heart. This is probably the feeling of falling out of love in the rumors. I used to hear people say how painful it is to be out of love, and how they forget about food and drink. But at this moment, for me, although I am sad, I never have the urge to cry.
I agree with what Aunt Xu said, Meng Dongxue must have her own reasons, otherwise she would never leave without saying goodbye. Should I go out now and go to her house overnight to find her and ask her clearly? Wouldn't it be a little too impulsive to do this? Or should I just accept the reality? She and I are not from the same world. If we are forced to be together, it will not only delay her youth in the future, but also make both of us unhappy. Is this really good?
After thinking wildly for a long time, I suddenly felt a slight soreness in my fingers. When I looked down, I realized that I had been holding the letter that Aunt Xu had just handed me in my hand, and because of too much force, my fingers had already closed the envelope. It's a little wrinkled. Only then did I pick up the letter in my hand and look at it. This letter was not written by Meng Dongxue to me, but from Meng Dongxue’s mother—she specifically asked me to bring Meng Dongxue back to the village. Feng family letter.
Because the envelope was torn open, it said "Meng Dongxue personally writes" on it, which was Meng's mother's handwriting.
With the envelope facing down, I dumped the contents on the bed. I found several pages of letter paper inside, folded together, and another envelope that had been folded in half. It was exactly the same as the outermost envelope, but there was no seal. was torn off, but never sealed. There is nothing written on the cover.
So I started to read those pages of letter paper. It was a letter home from Meng Dongxue’s mother. In addition to explaining a lot of things that happened at home, as well as the fact that Uncle Meng’s condition improved and he would soon return to work, the following page The whole half page of it almost said something related to me.
The content is probably that although I think I am a good young man, enthusiastic and sincere, and a kind person, after all, I am engaged in this profession, and I hope my daughter can be more cautious when making friends. It is said that Meng Dongxue is Chairman Mao's top soldier and a thoughtful young man, so he must know how to draw a clear line between "ghosts, ghosts and snakes" and "feudal remnants".
This is not self-deprecation on my part, I am just paraphrasing her mother’s exact words.
At the end of the letter, Meng's mother's tone suddenly became very firm. From between the lines, she knew about the hazy relationship between Meng Dongxue and I. Although it was a mother's advice to her daughter, the source was everywhere. It reveals a commanding tone, and there is even this sentence in the text:
"We are a family of communist intellectuals. We will never accept anyone who runs counter to Chairman Mao's thoughts. If Xiaoxue doesn't listen to your mother and father's advice, we won't be able to stop you, but we won't forgive you either. "
When I saw this sentence, I laughed bitterly for no reason. Because what Uncle Meng conveyed to me did not mean this. In other words, Meng’s mother took it upon herself to represent Meng Dongxue’s whole family, acting like she was there but not hers, forcing Meng Dongxue to make a choice that could not have the best of both worlds between family and love.
After reading the letter, I folded it again and put it aside. I didn’t quite understand Meng Dongxue’s purpose of leaving this letter from home to me. Then I opened another envelope and took out the letter inside. There are also two pages of letter paper, but the style of the letter paper is different. It's still Mother Meng's handwriting, but the recipient of this letter is me.
It turns out that when Mother Meng handed the letter to me, I picked up a thick one because there was another letter in that letter, one for my daughter and one for me. You just didn't tell me. Maybe whether Meng Dongxue will show me this letter depends on her attitude after reading her mother's letter.
Holding the letter in my hand, I began to read.
