From the contents of Zhou Yu's diary, we can roughly infer the causes and consequences of the night of October 13th. A middle-aged man with evil intentions would get her drunk under the pretext of saying goodbye, and then commit crimes after sending the others away.
At this moment, the personality consciousness of "Zhou Yu" woke up instead of Zhou Yu.
In other words, from beginning to end, Zhou Yu had no idea what kind of crisis she had experienced that night, so there was no possibility of mental trauma. That night was by no means the real cause of Zhou Yu's birth.
Another clue is that Zhou Yu mentioned "often forgetting things" on October 12th. From the description, it looks like he has been overtaken by other personalities. But Zhou Yu has no relevant memory about this, and so far, no evidence of a third personality has been found in this body.
Perhaps, these periods of blank memory are the real reasons why Zhou Yu created a second personality.
Another piece of evidence to support this conjecture is that on October 9th and October 12th, there were slight torn pages between the two diaries. Zhou Yu herself didn't seem to notice it, but she didn't hide it from the other personality who read the diary over and over several times.
It stands to reason that the content recorded on this disappeared page should be what happened between October 10th and October 11th. But what is left now are just a few torn pages.
If you want to know what happened during that time, I'm afraid it's useless to ask Zhou Yu herself. Because the diary after October 12th has completely returned to normal, and even the description of things that are easy to forget does not appear much.
Although the exact contents of that page are no longer known, in mid-November, clues hidden in the diary were discovered.
When Zhou Yu wrote the torn page, she must have been in an extreme emotion. Therefore, part of her handwriting penetrated the paper and was deeply imprinted on the adjacent pages.
After repeated touching with your fingers, you can piece together those frantic words that seem to be used to vent.
There is only one word written.
Various, chaotic, huge "kill" characters.
Yes, hidden in those plain written records on October 12th is a crazy heart that kept writing evil words not long ago and was on the verge of losing control.
Those deep carvings and sword-like strokes must be caused by extreme fear, if not hatred and anger.
Who does Zhou Yu want to kill? Or on the other hand, who wants to kill her?
After discovering this, Zhou Yu made up his mind. Maybe my own personality is not that simple.
If she was planning to kill someone, forget it. If someone was planning to kill her, she would be in this defenseless situation just waiting to be killed.
As a result, he and Zhou Yu began to share the same body. During the day, the main character carries out ordinary daily life, and at night, he spends about an hour reading the diary and understanding everything around him.
This small-scale routine investigation was carried out by Zhou Yu and continued for a period of time.
On that day, Zhou Yu fell asleep on the subway, which made him realize that his personality was being followed, and Zhou Yu decided to start activities during the day.
This is very simple, because the personality switching between the two is clearly conditional on "falling asleep".
Zhou Yu can control the personality transformation by just trying to mix a little sleeping pill into Zhou Yu's daily drink. In fact, as long as he exhausted all his energy while controlling his body, Zhou Yu would feel exhausted after waking up and fall asleep again soon.
Because Zhou Yu's memory did not include geographical information about the city, he spent a lot of effort to become familiar with the environment.
Then, on the night of December 16th, after a ridiculous experience, he let go of Zhang Mumu, who had been following Zhou Yu for two weeks.
…
When we returned to the rental house, it was already one o'clock in the morning on the 17th. Zhou Yu opened the diary and began to practice handwriting - just like gender differences, his handwriting and Zhou Yu's were also completely different. His handwriting was concise and forceful, and could be distinguished from the beautiful cursive calligraphy of the protagonist at a glance.
At this stage, because there are not many activities, there has not been any occasion where I need to write. But if the activities continue, the protagonist will surely become suspicious sooner or later.
It's probably not that far away that the time comes when the diary needs to be faked so that the dual personality can be disguised as forgetfulness.
Practice for half an hour, restore everything to its original state, cut all the practice papers into pieces, soak them in water and throw them into the toilet to flush them away, and then take a ten-minute shower.
The soundproofing effect of the single room Zhou Yu rented was very poor. In order not to disturb other people, the hair dryer was not allowed during this period. She could only wrap her wet hair with a towel.
It would be much more convenient if she had short hair, but unfortunately Zhou Yu has no plans to cut her hair. She wrote in her diary, "Long hair gives me a sense of security."
Zhou Yu looked at the girl in the mirror.
To be honest, he thought Zhou Yu looked good with long hair.
Moreover, from a psychoanalytic perspective, it seems logical that "Zhou Yu", the protective personality created by Zhou Yu, was given the setting of "like the qualities she possesses".
After wiping his hair with a towel, he untied the towel and put on his underwear and nightgown.
If people who have not personally experienced it imagine the current situation, they will probably feel embarrassed, or they will be very excited when they see the body of the opposite sex.
But based on Zhou Yu's experience, these two feelings have almost never happened.
Wearing a flip-back bra was really confusing to him at first, but he got the hang of it after a few tries. A dress that zips in the back is the same as sandals that need to be tied with a ribbon.
When it comes to makeup, I can’t say I’m proficient in it. The simplest things like powdering, drawing eyebrows, and applying lipstick can be mastered by watching instructional videos.
As a personality, why bother giving them a halo of terror? In the final analysis, these are just technologies that arise from the accumulation of experience. As long as there is a practical need, anyone can master it.
In Zhou Yu's eyes, dressing this body in women's clothing is a purely technical task. He resides in this body, but this body is not "mine." For Zhou Yu, rather than seeing it as a real human body, it is better to see it as armor and a mask.
This does not mean that this body is boring to him. The truth is completely opposite, Zhou Yu is at least a beauty above the level of comeliness. Although the body proportions are not very exaggerated, the curves are beautiful and the posture is correct, which is very consistent with the appearance and temperament.
If you only evaluate it from one aspect, it may not be particularly outstanding, but the overall feeling is just right. If you change any point, the concept of "Zhou Yu" will become blurred.
The girl stood in front of the full-length mirror covered with moisture. Since the lights were not turned on, only the hazy human body was vaguely visible in the darkness.
The outlines and lines drawn by pale colors are like a beauty lamp that emits a shimmering light.
Zhou Yu admired this body very much. Although he hadn't really seen it from an outsider's perspective, he confirmed that he would fall in love with the person who had this body.
It may seem superficial to say this, but falling in love with the body is much simpler and easier to understand than falling in love with the soul.
In other words, as someone's second personality, "Zhou Yu", who was born to relieve stress and is someone's spiritual element, wants to love another spiritual whole. Isn't it ridiculous?
What's more, if you want to discuss the soul, there is probably no one in this world who is farther away from the master personality than him.
Without the exchange of eyes and conversation of words, "falling in love with the soul" would be impossible to talk about. They are like two sides of a piece of paper, conceptually inaccessible. "Zhou Yu"'s eyes can never see "Zhou Yu", and "Zhou Yu" can never see her own sub-personality.
The only thing they have in common is their familiarity with this body. What will she do once she realizes the existence of "Zhou Yu"? It would probably not be surprising if you were so frightened that you immediately went to see a psychiatrist.
No matter how you think about it, it is disturbing to think that there is a heterosexual personality with criminal tendencies living in your body.
Unfortunately, medical research so far does not seem to have developed an effective treatment for dissociative personality disorder. In other words, a personality cannot be killed artificially. We can only hope that the personalities will accept the reality of sharing the same body, cooperate and coexist, and spend their lives peacefully in this state.
However, under special circumstances, patients develop extreme anti-human personalities, which cannot be solved simply by "cooperative symbiosis".
Domestic law also seems to recognize dual personality patients as having full capacity for criminal responsibility. In other words, it is regarded as a crime committed by ordinary people.
When a personality commits a sin, it is this body that is judged.
In the dark room, the naked, pale girl smiled at herself.
Zhou Yu, who repeatedly wrote the word "kill" in her diary, must not have been able to imagine this. The biggest threat to her personal safety right now is neither the person she wants to kill nor the person who wants to kill her.
Rather - he shared her life and death with her, but without a doubt he belonged to the "self" who was a natural born killer.
