As a homebody. As a former professional otaku, there are many things that cannot be avoided.
For example, you may be attracted by the headlines, but as soon as you click on it, you will be blinded.
For example, as a professional pause party, for the sake of welfare, I concentrated on the pause and play button. As a result, the screen flashed and I subconsciously clicked pause. The screen was frozen on a picture composed of muscles and chest hair. Dog Eyes suffered again as a result.
Another example is that in a dispute, I was ravaged by a rotten girl, and I had to think that if I don't enter the tiger's den, I won't get the tiger's cubs. In order to understand the enemy deeply so that he can defeat him next time, he forced himself to look at something with his blind eyes.
Of course, there are even rarer animals than giant pandas. As a non-biological major, I lack research on such rare animals, so it is inconvenient to discuss them.
In short, more or less, willingly or unwillingly. You will also come into contact with some rotten things, and you will be out in the world, so how can you not change your knife?
But I didn't expect that. That blind dog-eye memory that only occupied one hundred thousandth of one of his brain cells and had been almost forgotten would actually come in handy at a time like this.
From another perspective, this is also a great tragedy in life. As a senior otaku, why did the content of my first missionary in the Dark Continent turn out to be rotten things, you bastard? ! !
It's like Si Tuman traveled to another planet and became a monster there, just like Blizzard stopped skipping tickets and started running away instead. It's so... nonsense! ! !
When the three of them put down the dying Hans and turned around, they were facing me who was walking back unsteadily.
"Hey, brother Alsace, are you safe?"
Ricken asked with a strong tone of doubt, a pair of eyes full of thirst for knowledge.
Forget it, I'm too lazy to complain about his intention of the word "even".
Looking here, Ricken turned his gaze to the other side and found that Hannah seemed to have been severely hit. She was kneeling on her knees, supporting her upper body with both hands, and her dazzling long fiery red hair hanging down. Covering her face.
His eyes returned to the Alsatian brother in front of him. The mental blow he received seemed to be more severe. His entire figure turned pale, just like a pencil sketch, with only a faint black line outlining a rough humanoid outline. General.
Although I don’t quite understand what’s going on, this situation should be a lose-lose situation no matter how you look at it, but Brother Alsace is really amazing. Although he ended up like this, he still managed to stop the rampaging Hannah. , this is something even Hans, who grew up with Hannah, cannot do.
If he could do it, he wouldn't have had to jump into the glacier and turn into a lump of ice.
"Brother Alsace, are you okay?"
He saw the other party standing silently beside the campfire, shaking his neck like a dead man, not even noticing when his thumb was inserted into the scarlet charcoal fire.
It's "not" okay, it's just "I just lost some of the most important things as a human being."
With a lifeless sentence that seemed to be spat out from the mouth of a ghost, the last trace of soul in the other party's body seemed to follow these words and flow out of his mouth.
This, isn’t this okay? Cold sweat broke out on the foreheads of the three of them.
"Brother Alsace, stay strong."
I held it in for a long time. The kind-hearted Paladin Baal finally said a word of comfort that didn't look like comfort.
"Well, that's right. Let's just let this world be destroyed."
Three people:
"It's over. Brother Alsace seems to be dying."
After a moment of silence, the three of them quietly hid aside and started whispering to each other.
"Would you like to go over and beat him awake?"
After a hearty group beating of Hans, Kira seemed to have something awakening in her soul, and she licked her tongue. Gearing up, he suggested with some enthusiasm.
Be careful if he lets his dog bite you. " Ricken rolled his eyes at the other party.
Thinking of Xiao Er's heroic appearance on the battlefield, and then imagining herself surrounded by four such ghost wolves with grinning teeth, Kira shuddered and smiled, her soul just awakened and ignited. Extinguished quickly.
"Just get him drunk and let's get it over with. There should be no problem when he wakes up tomorrow."
Paladin Baal, who was not very bright in his mind, came up with a very practical although not very creative method, which immediately won the approval of the other two people.
"Well, brother Alsace
After they had discussed it, they returned to the campfire. Just as they were about to talk, they found that Hannah in the distance had stood up at some unknown time, with her beautiful long hair hanging down, and walking straight towards this side with firm steps.
The trio who were about to speak involuntarily closed their mouths, their eyes constantly wandering between the two people. In their eyes, another storm was brewing.
"Snapped!"
In their stunned eyes, Hannah came to the other party, knelt down respectfully, and placed her palms on the ground. Putting his forehead against the back of his palm, he bowed and made a big salute.
"Old,, old four!!"
Three pairs of mouths. In an instant, it became the largest.
Fourth child? !
What kind of divine unfolding is this? Could it be that Alsace is Hannah's long-lost brother? If that's the case, then the scene just now makes sense.
The three of them took it upon themselves to complete the story in their minds about the man named Alsace in front of them, who was separated from his parents when he was young. Living alone and homeless. Living a miserable life of begging and even having to compete with wild dogs for food, the poor boy Yi Fei read did not give up hope. In the end, his efforts made him a powerful adventurer that everyone longed for and reunited with his relatives. Inspirational life.
"I'm so touched. I didn't expect that brother Alsace had such an unknown and tragic past."
Even Paladin Baal, who had a low level of tears, wiped away tears without permission after finishing it in his mind.
Hey, you bastards, don't tamper with my past in your mind! !
And you, yes, it’s you, the rotten girl who has severely damaged my precious otaku self-esteem. Who is your fourth child? In fact, you want to say it is the teacher, even though I know you rarely say a word a year. This may lead to pronunciation problems, but I won’t agree if it causes other people’s misunderstanding! !
I barely managed to pull myself together, and immediately gave the other party a merciless rant, then patted my knees, ready to get up.
What a nightmare day. Forget it, go back to bed early and wait until tomorrow to think about how to hypnotize yourself and completely forget about today's events.
"Old...teacher!"
When I was about to get up, Hannah, who was lying on the ground, screamed again. Although she stuttered a bit, she finally corrected her pronunciation.
who? Who is your teacher now? ! Holy shit, are you even pulling your pants?
Seeing a hand that was on the ground stretched out at lightning speed, and gently but firmly pinched my trousers with his thumb and index finger, I couldn't help but roll my eyes.
Tsk "Teacher, please accept the lesson, hahaha"
You must have bitten your tongue just now. This guy couldn't even say five words before he bit his own tongue! !
Beside the campfire, four people, including me, looked at Hannah who secretly stuck out her tongue in pain, and suddenly fell into a powerful speechless state.
Look, this is what happens when you rarely say a word in a year. Good boy, don’t imitate because you think you are queer, otherwise you will be the unlucky one in the end.
What exactly do you want to say? "
Although I can roughly guess what Hannah just said, I don’t want to admit it, so I can only ask here.
Please "Please accept Xueheihaha ah ah heart woo woo"
Bite again! This guy bit his tongue again! ! To bite the same sentence in the same place for the second time, how powerful is the natural force? ! ! !
If I had a complaining folding fan in my hand at this moment, I would definitely slap it hard on the other person's head without hesitation.
Slow "Take your time, don't rush."
Seeing that the other person was sticking out his tongue in pain, with a regretful look on his face, and his eyes even flashed with tears of urgency, looking like a weak and aggrieved girl, I had no choice but to comfort him in a dumbfounded way.
Taking a deep breath, it seemed that he finally calmed down this time.
"teacher!"
Oh, the standards are clear, not bad, not bad.
"Please accept Xueheihahahaha
I:
Be willing to:
Kira:"
Barr:
The girl who bit her tongue for the third time ran back to her tent with tears of self-rejection under everyone's speechless gaze.
"Brother Alsace, am I sick? Why do I suddenly think Hannah looked so cute just now?"
Ricken was stunned for a while before muttering to himself.
The other two nodded.
"Congratulations on your love."
I congratulated the other party expressionlessly.
If the other party is not a fujoshi, this powerful natural attribute can indeed make my otaku soul burn a bit. Unfortunately, this is only if, all the cute settings will become dim under the premise of fujoshi.
Forget it, go to sleep. It's best to forget everything about today after a good sleep. After a yawn, I left the three grown men in a daze and went straight to the tent.
I had a dreamless night, and early the next morning, I lay down in a daze, feeling weak all over my body.
No, yesterday's fierce battle coupled with a hangover made my current physical condition make a not-so-sounding sound of bone friction. I really should go back to the camp and sleep for three days and three nights.
After getting dressed in a daze and washing up, I planned to make a suggestion to Ricken and the others to return to the camp immediately.
The tent had just been opened, and a girl with beautiful waist-length red hair was sitting upright in front of the door. She raised her head and gave me a charming smile with her delicate face.
"I:
Hannah:
If you ask me what is more tragic than an otaku fighting a fujoshi, I will answer without hesitation at this moment - when an otaku is worshiped by a fujoshi.
With a hiss, the tent door was closed again.
Forget it, it seems that the nightmare is not over yet, I have to go back to bed and sleep again.
Wang was thinking this, but the tent door was opened very rudely. Ah, it seemed that he was completely entangled.
I sighed helplessly, sat feebly on the chair, and stretched out my hand towards the opposite position in understanding, asking him to sit down.
"That, Sister Hannah"
Looking at Hannah who looked so excited and eager to try, I didn't know what to say for a moment. It was such a pity that she turned out to be a fujoshi, otherwise she would be a petite and cute beautiful girl.
Tsk "Teacher, call me"
It's only been one night, have you been knocked back to your original shape again? I covered my forehead and sighed.
"Call me" just call me "Aleus". "
Okay, um, Arius
Aleus, who she used to be, is unexpectedly cute, which is seriously inconsistent with her status as a fujoshi. Once she said it so hard, I stopped arguing about these small issues. I sat up a little and looked at the other party seriously.
"Actually, I'm not interested in this aspect."
No, it's not just a lack of interest, but also a fear of offending the other person. Disgusting is the most appropriate modifier.
"Lie,, lie!!"
Regarding the first formal interview between otakus and rotten girls, as soon as I finished my first sentence, tears of grievance filled the eyes of the other party.
Well, in fact, Hannah "Ahem, Aleus, it's not surprising that she has such thoughts. She can't possibly know that I came here from another world of information explosion, and I just accidentally came into contact with some of those things.
In her opinion, with such "advanced" and "missing points" experience, she must be a member of the same profession, and this is the most troublesome part.
What should we do?
To make the other party truly believe that she is not a homosexual is definitely not something that can be done in a short time. No, looking at her firm eyes now, it may never be possible.
Anyway, I have to go back to the first world once more, and I won’t have much contact time in the future, so I might as well leave it like this.
"Ahem, Aleus, don't interrupt, listen to me first." After careful consideration. I coughed a few times and began to speak slowly.
"First of all, I want to tell you, whether you believe it or not, I am not the kind of person you think. This is the main premise, so I will never accept you as a student."
Seeing that the other party's blue pupils were widening and seemed to be turning dark, I quickly made a change.
"However, regarding this matter, I will give you some reference and suggestions to the best of my ability. What do you think?"
Alius's current mentality is not simply about his admiration for me. Whether he is an otaku or a fujoshi, he actually hopes to have a friend with whom he has a common topic. He has been alone on this road of fujoshi and has explored so much. For a long time, I think that in her subconscious mind, she is most happy about my appearance not because of my "advanced" and "missing points" experiences, but because she just hopes to have a friend with whom she has a common topic.
By the way, when did I transform into a psychological emperor? Probably because I am an otaku, I have a little understanding of fujoshi Aleus, who is the natural enemy of otakus. Isn’t there a saying that the person who knows you best is your own enemy?
Of course, this is just an understanding, and the two have nothing in common.
Sure enough, after hearing what I said, the tears of despair that were about to burst out of Alius's eyes instantly turned into tears of joy.
"Old,, teacher is like this hahahahaha
Ah, I bit my tongue again. This guy bit my tongue again. After listening to it so many times, I finally figured out some rules. As long as I speak more than four words in a row, this guy will definitely bite his tongue.
Is this considered a cute attribute?
Soon, the first professional life symposium between the otaku and the rotten girl officially began, although it was a unilateral exchange of rotten knowledge between Aleus.
Sure enough, it still doesn't work. Who can help me?
In order to avoid being eroded by corrupt knowledge, I can only take the initiative in the topic and try to guide it to irrelevant places. This is not difficult. Aleus doesn't speak very fluently, so of course it is impossible to win. Besides, her real purpose in her heart is not to learn those things from herself. She just wants to find true friends who don't despise her preferences and can understand her.
Although saying this is a bit too pitiful for Arius, I still have to yell in my heart, let like-minded people go to hell, who is a like-minded rotten girl? ! !
"By the way, Arius, when I was in the camp, I heard from your brother Hans that you seemed to go out a lot and didn't know why. You didn't even participate in training, right? What on earth did you do? Can you tell me? ?”
With a gentle sip of tea, this life interview began in an atmosphere that seemed relaxed and harmonious, but in fact there was an undercurrent surging underneath, although this undercurrent was only caused by me unilaterally.
"Yes, it is. Suddenly it’s okay, Haha! "
I just reminded you, please use more commas in the future, looking at Arius who bit his tongue and was in pain. I sighed helplessly, but I had to admit that this flaw was very cute, if the other person was not a fujoshi.
"Aleus, I, of course I'm going to investigate, too." "
Great, I finally know how to make good use of commas.
"Investigation, investigation of what?" As soon as I asked, I regretted it.
As expected, after hearing my question, Aleus lifted up the two-meter-high notes from the inventory with gleaming eyes.
Without her introduction, I also knew what kind of things were recorded in these notes that exuded a serious "rotten" smell.
Seeing Arius looking at me with hope, his thoughts of "Let's take a look, come and take a look" written all over his face, I swallowed involuntarily.
It's really your own fault, you can't live.
"Don't be busy with these for now. I'll read them later when I have time. Yes, that's right. Aleus, can you tell me, what is the best subject in your mind?"
While changing the topic, my mind became active, maybe,
I'm in a hurry today, so I'll talk about it later. Regarding the plot, I will try my best to take time to plan in the past few days. I won't stay here for too long. I'm sorry, because I have been really busy at work recently and there is no free time at all. It’s time to think about the plot, so please bear with me.
