"You little bastard! You hurt me on purpose, right?"
Dragging his heavy legs and feet back to the lobby of the post house, before Xiao Han could find a bench to sit down and take a breath, an angry voice sounded from upstairs!
When he heard this voice, Xiao Han didn't even need to look up to know that this was definitely Tang Jian who had eaten dumplings with him last night.
Come to think of it, he must have been struggling a lot this night.
"Hey, Mr. Tang! You are wronging me! If I really did it on purpose, do you think I can still risk my life and eat with you like this? The most important thing is, the latrine upstairs, then But I gave it to you!"
With a deep sigh, Xiao Han waved his hand feebly toward the upstairs.
Having had diarrhea all night, it was a big burden for him to even breathe now. He really didn't have the energy to argue with Tang Jian again.
"Hmph, even if you didn't do it on purpose, it was because of you!" Upstairs, Tang Jian's tone softened slightly. He naturally knew that Xiao Han had also been struggling all night, but this resentment was not beyond his reach. Where could it be directed? hair?
Yesterday, there was a lot of trouble during the day, but at night, Xiao Han came to ask him to eat New Year dumplings. Tang Jian was quite happy at the time, thinking that this was an apology, but he didn't expect that the apology was false, and that it was a real apology to find someone to suffer with!
If he had known this would be the case, he would rather squat in his room and eat steamed buns than eat a meal of dumplings that were as powerful as laxatives.
"Did I cause it? I just want to eat Chinese New Year dumplings. Am I wrong?"
On the other side, Xiao Han was originally angry, but when he heard Tang Jian put all the responsibility on him, he immediately felt his anger rising and couldn't help but choked with him.
"Hey, are you right? Could it be that I am wrong? I am already so old, and I almost died from you last night..."
"I haven't slept all night either! I'm still freezing my butt!"
"I don't care if you sleep or not! I'm just sleeping?"
"..."
"..."
The air suddenly became quiet! The whole inn seemed so quiet that you could hear a pin drop.
The two people who had been fighting like chickens just now suddenly realized the ambiguity in their words, and their faces turned dark.
toss? Not sleeping? butt?
Why do these words sound more like carrying a mountain behind you the more you listen to them?
"Bang!"
Just when the inn fell into deathly silence, suddenly, the side door of the inn was pushed open forcefully!
Immediately afterwards, a fool wearing a dog-skin hat rushed in from the outside.
"Master Hou! Master Hou! Duke Tang? Have you seen my Master Hou?"
The fool who rushed into the inn didn't even notice the dark-faced Xiao Han. He grabbed the railing and rushed to the second floor with ease.
As a result, when he was halfway up, he suddenly saw Tang Jian. He stopped quickly, saluted him, and asked about the location of the head of the family.
"Downstairs!" Tang Jian looked downstairs with a sullen face and pressed harder.
"Down there?" The idiot didn't notice Tang Jian's strangeness. When he heard that Xiao Han was down there, he subconsciously turned his head to look down.
Sure enough, in the direction Tang Jian pointed, he saw Xiao Han, whose face was sallow, as if he was seriously ill.
"Master Hou? What's wrong with you?" Seeing Xiao Han's current appearance, the fool was shocked! He jumped down from the stairs that were as high as one person, rushed to Xiao Han and asked urgently.
"Don't worry about what happened to me. Let me ask you first, did you eat yesterday's dumplings?"
Downstairs, Xiao Han was surprised to see that he could still climb over the railing and seemed to be fine!
Although he didn't ask the fool to eat dumplings together last night, with his temperament, it's impossible not to eat dumplings secretly, right? ! But why is he okay?
"Those dumplings you mentioned? I ate them!" Sure enough, the fool quickly nodded stupidly, not hiding them at all.
"Is your stomach feeling uncomfortable?"
"No, it's fine!"
"How many dumplings have you eaten?"
"Just two! Hey, I wanted to eat a few more, but that bastard Xiaodong hid all the ones in the pot while I was delivering dumplings to you, so he left two for me to try. Taste! Shameless people, eating alone will cause diarrhea, don’t you know?!”
The idiot complained to Xiao Han, and he was worried about not eating enough dumplings. His words made Tang Jian and Xiao Han even more embarrassed.
Eat alone and have diarrhea? Who are these idiots talking about!
"Where's Xiaodong? Why didn't you see him this morning?" Rolling his eyes, Xiao Han decided not to be familiar with this idiot, and instead asked where Xiaodong was at this time.
"Xiaodong? Isn't he in the room?" Hearing Xiao Han's question, the idiot pointed directly towards the room where he slept without even thinking about it!
But after he finished pointing, he suddenly realized, scratched his head and said: "Huh? From what you said, I really didn't see him today? Where did this little bastard go?
"That's right, where can this guy run?!"
Just when Xiao Han and Lengzi were surprised together.
In the corner of the first floor, in the latrine that Xiao Han couldn't kick open no matter how hard he kicked, an extremely weak voice came: "Uh, I'm here... Someone come in and give me a hand. My legs are numb and I can't crawl." Came in..."
——————
During the New Year's Eve meal, three people were knocked down, including a prince! A prince!
If this matter were dealt with in Chang'an, it would definitely be a major event that shocked both the government and the public! Countless poisoning theories and conspiracy theories are expected to spread throughout the capital in an instant!
Maybe even the people in Baiqisi would be alarmed by this, and throw the cook, vegetable vendor, and all the staff of the post into prison and torture them severely.
However, if this happened in Shuofang, there would not be so many problems.
It seemed that nothing happened except that Yi Cheng was so frightened that he rolled his eyes and fainted.
And the Yi Cheng who fainted would not have thought that just when he fainted, a message came from the north, and then quickly spread throughout Shuofang City!
"General Li Jing took advantage of the cover of consecutive days of heavy snow to lead three thousand elite soldiers across the Yinshan Mountains, which was said to be insurmountable. They attacked for hundreds of miles overnight and destroyed Dingxiang City! They captured the drums and giant banners that symbolized the authority of the Khan!"
"General Chai Shao, with thousands of cavalry, has bypassed Dingxiang City and is pursuing Jie Li fiercely!"
Before this news came, no one could have imagined that after a month of depression, the Turkic Army would present such a unique New Year's gift to the Tang Dynasty in the first month of the fourth year of Zhenguan!
The wild geese fly high in the moonlight, and the Chanyu escapes in the night.
When I want to chase Qingqi away, the heavy snow covers my bow and sword.
It is said that this is a poem that Xiao Han was so surprised that he couldn't help but recite it after hearing the news.
This poem was greatly appreciated by Tang Jian at the time, and he carefully copied it and sent it to Chang'an along with the good news report, becoming a unique poetic style to record this battle.
Of course, for the purpose of rigorous scholarship, Tang Jian also recorded the verses and environment in which this poem was written below the verses.
In the fourth year of Zhenguan, on the first day of the Lunar New Year, Xiaohou heard that our army had won a great victory in the toilet. He couldn't help but be overjoyed on the spot, and he accomplished it in one fell swoop!
