She is not afraid of waiting until there is no time to return, nor is she afraid of facing death. She is only afraid that she will miss her entire life when she was in a hurry when she was young.
"I'm sorry." Time and space seemed to be silent for a moment, and Yin Baishuang suddenly spoke quietly.
Balian was stunned for a moment, as if he understood what she meant, and said with a wry smile: "I am the one who should say I'm sorry, because I made you wait for me for two hundred years in vain."
Yin Baishuang's fingers on his waist trembled slightly, her forehead pressed against his back, her eyes were slightly red: "If I hadn't gone to Nanze Mountain to say those words to you, you wouldn't have..."
"Xiaoshuang." Balian interrupted her gently and gently, and said seriously: "This is not your fault. This all stems from my cowardice and unbearability."
Yin Baishuang pursed her lips and asked softly: "If you had known back then, I would have waited for you for two hundred years, and even if I had not waited for you for two hundred years, I would have kept waiting. Would you still have made that choice?"
Baili Anjing was silent for a moment and said, "No."
Yin Baishuang smiled sadly, and her eyes suddenly became astringent: "You don't seem to realize how much I like you."
Balian: "..."
Yin Baishuang's fingertips on his waist dug into his skin slightly, and her body finally began to tremble uncontrollably.
"Just now you asked me what I was thinking about when I was preparing to jump off the abyss, and I said I was thinking about you.
But Xiao An, I don’t understand. When you drew your sword and killed yourself on Nanze Mountain two hundred years ago, did you think of me? "
She asked softly, her smile becoming more and more bitter: "You seem to have never thought from the beginning that after you die, I will be able to wait for someone for hundreds of thousands of years, or even a lifetime.
Maybe you just think that I am the fairy lady of Cangwu Palace, with golden branches and jade leaves. That brief encounter when we were young was just the beginning of love and the budding youth of youth.
You feel that you have passed through my heart, but you have only passed by. After all, it is easy to fall in love at first sight, but it is rare to stay with me for a long time to come.
You must have been thinking about me at the moment you died, one day in the future, instead of crying all over the place when you couldn't get it at the beginning, you gradually became peaceful and began to accept the lovely but unavailable things in life, right? ? "
Balian didn't speak.
Yin Baishuang's pair of apricot eyes that were once as bright as Shunhua were stained with moisture, and the crystal liquid rolled down like beads, sliding down from her face as beautiful as mist.
"But you don't know that you are so important in my heart and have become the only unbreakable knot in my life.
We had a surprise meeting when I was sixteen years old. What I know... is that I used some care. If I hadn't taken the initiative to express my feelings and forced you to speak, maybe even you yourself wouldn't have known that you liked me.
But I also know that your like is different from my like, right? "
Hearing this, Bailian's eyes flashed twice, she held the hand on his waist, and gently and powerfully wrapped her little hand tightly under his palm.
He said softly: "When I was very young, I heard many people say that I was born with high hopes for all sentient beings. I am a symbol of the long-lasting peace between Zhongyou and Tianxi. In this entire world, all over the world, no matter what, I can't find anyone with a more noble status than me.
Everyone in the world says that I should inherit my father's legacy and carry forward Tianxi Swordsmanship. Hundreds of immortal sects envy me, and those of my sect and contemporaries are jealous of me.
Until later, they discovered that I was just a mediocre person, and their envy and jealousy doubled into ridicule and gloating, and everyone secretly wanted to step on me.
My father wanted me to be successful, so he trapped me in that small bamboo-fenced courtyard in the name of love, leaving me in the cold in the desert.
My mother hoped that I would be safe and happy. He said that a loving mother would often fail, and even limited the number of times my mother could visit me.
In my memory, my childhood was filled with boring books.
I cannot show too much love for other things, because in this way, my father will be sure that I will become bored with things and destroy the things I love without any threat.
Before I came down from the mountain at the age of fifteen, I had never had a moment of indulgence. It seemed that I had been trapped in a cage all my life.
Looking through my past life, in my memory, I can't remember whether my father ever smiled at me, and I don't know when I started to get used to a person and slowly no longer need him.
And in my father's eyes, I gradually no longer see any warmth. He needs a perfect son to inherit his great legacy of swordsmanship, but I am obviously not perfect, or even ordinary, useless and disappointing.
So slowly, when he looked at me, he no longer seemed to be looking at his own child, but as if he were looking at an object, a bad stone that exhausted all his patience but had to continue polishing.
Whatever shape he wants me to take, I should grow into that shape according to his wishes.
If there is even the slightest difference from his expectations, I will use a file to cut off the "crooked" part of myself before he notices it, and restore the neat appearance in his mind. "
“I thought this was how my life should be, but it wasn’t until I met you later that I realized there was another way to live in this world.
It's like I walked a long way through the night to see you and walk toward you, just like a beautiful process of running from darkness to light.
Xiaoshuang, you are right, my liking is different from yours. My feelings are far less pure, simple and direct than yours. "
"Perhaps while I like you, I also regard you as a driftwood in my life, a warm straw.
I am attached to you, and regard this attachment as a kind of support and parasitism, so that even I have never noticed it.
In this relationship, I am weak and incompetent, and I even hope that you can come and save me. "
Yin Baishuang lowered her eyes for a moment, and when she raised her eyes again, the fog in her eyes had not dissipated, but her face was a bit brighter and clearer, and her bright eyes seemed to contain a layer of light.
She said: "I must be terminally ill. When I saw you in that small temple having an attack of Wan Ming Dan, I felt that I couldn't leave you alone.
From that moment on, I had the desire to grasp the vastness of this life, and I must give you stars in the sky. So whenever you need me to save you, I will definitely come. "
"You don't know how much I like you. I don't blame you, but I want to tell you now..."
Yin Baishuang placed her chin between his shoulders and neck, leaned close to him, pressed her chest against Bai Lian's back, and squeezed against him shyly.
Across his chest, there was a clear beating and vibration sound from a calm and blazing heart.
Every stroke seemed to want to melt into his bones and blood, making him aware of the pain and coldness deep in his soul.
"This heart cannot be easily provoked, because once this heart is handed over and yearned for you, it will no longer be mine.
I can afford it, but I can't take it back. If you give it up, I can only guard this feeling miserably. My heart is not big, and I can only love one person in my life. "
"Two hundred years ago, my encounter with you was destined to be an endless fireworks, fleeting, but what I want to say is, thanks to your appearance, I will be happy for many years."
It's like that year comes again.
The flowing water ruffles the clothes, and the shadows are still reflected.
The world is vast and all living beings are vast. In this great world of Nine Burns, a girl said that she would give her a sky full of stars.
What Balian said was right, she was a warm straw and a burning torch.
It illuminated a path for him in the endless darkness, which he will never forget.
After a thrilling confession, Yin Baishuang felt relieved, but instead became more aggrieved and heartbroken.
“I have always believed that if we can meet each other in front of the mountain, we will definitely meet again behind the mountain.
It’s true that you like me, but it’s also true that you don’t understand me. It’s true that I love you, but it’s also true that I don’t understand you.
The time we have known each other has been too short. If we really count, we have known each other for less than seven days.
But you have been with that lunatic Su Jing day and night for two whole years.
So you see, two hundred years later, your appearance has changed so much that I can't even recognize you, but she can recognize you at a glance and keep me in the dark. It's so miserable! "
Balian laughed out loud and couldn't help but tilt his head and rub her forehead with his cheek: "Speaking of which, when we first met in Kongcang Mountain, you stabbed me?"
He joked: "Is it possible that you really don't like this skin, and you prefer the original one?"
Yin Baishuang said: "It's not that I like your appearance, but I like all your looks. However, after being troubled by Ying Xiu for two hundred years, your once handsome and beautiful eyebrows are really not that big now that I think about it. I miss it so much.
When I stabbed you at Kongcang Mountain, thinking back on it now makes me feel really uncomfortable.
Later, I was desperately wary of you, and I did not hesitate to compromise for fear that you would take longevity away from me. I was really stupid. Life was originally yours, and it was so close to you. Why couldn't I have thought of it. "
Baili listened quietly to her words and said softly: "It's not that I can't think of it, but that I don't dare to think about it. I'm afraid that my joy will be empty, and I'm afraid that my old friend's heart will be over, and it will be empty in a blink of an eye."
But the fact is that the two of them crossed the ark because they were old friends.
The mist in Yin Baishuang's eyes was like a wrinkled clear lake.
She laughed, the ends of her eyes slowly raised, and her whole body became energetic again, just like the beautiful appearance when they met at the beginning of the year.
The girl, whose face and eyes were as beautiful as before, said to him: "This is the first time we met, let's get to know each other, Cangwu Palace, Yin Baishuang. I will only tell the friends I recognize this name. The young lady was so happy that the man was born so handsome. Sir, you can just call me Xiaoshuang."
Seeing her smile, Bailian couldn't help but laugh too: "I first met you when I was in the imperial court of Zhongyou Dynasty Bailian, whose name is Hidden Sword. It is a blessing in my life to be able to meet the girl and not be my friend. I wish you the best." The harp, the music is perfect and perfect. I have a purpose to drink wine, with the heart of a happy guest."
Yin Baishuang hugged him gently: "Now, we have gotten to know each other again. I don't blame you if you don't understand me. I have always been very patient and I will teach you slowly."
It only takes a moment to like someone, but it is not easy to fully understand someone's heart.
Just like how could Balian know that she was the stubborn and bright girl who was as bright as the sun?
One day, I will end up being drunk all day long, dreaming about the old person before I die.
If it hadn't been for the arrangement of time, how would Yin Baishuang know that such a meek and unyielding young man in her memory could deeply carry out his determination to die rather than live in ruins.
The sky and the earth were filled with fire, and those long-lasting memories that had been sealed in the heart seemed to be carefully treasured by the two of them tacitly at this moment.
Hearing about the past again feels like the wind has passed through my heart, suddenly open-minded and indifferent.
Just because they both know that we are not as young as before, and it is not up to you and me to get together and separate.
Destinations come and go, and the life chart becomes tangled up into a mess, which has long been difficult to sort out.
Floating life is blown like snow, and the taste of the world is boiled into tea. Only when you have a broad mind can you not linger in your heart.
The wild fire is filling the sky, the fierce fire is burning the river, and the ruins of the Moqi Palace are like the wind and rain, and there is nothing that can turn into fire at any time.
Although Bailian didn't have any countermeasures in mind, at this moment, his heart felt lighter than ever before.
It has nothing to do with life or death, or the way back. It just respects this life and does not bear any responsibility for it.
"Xiao Shuang, I have a gift for you."
The spiritual power of the Qiankun Pouch at his waist was poured into it, and as the light flickered, a simple black-sheathed silver-carved long sword was taken by Bai Lian into his palm and held lightly in his arm.
Yin Baishuang cried out in a low voice, with uncontrollable surprise and surprise in her eyes, and shook Bai Lian's arm: "Mo Yang Sword?!"
Before Balian could speak, the next moment her ears were pinched by her cold jade-like hands. Yin Baishuang raised her slender eyebrows and said, "Hey, Xiao An, it turns out that when we dropped the sword, you picked it up quietly. , could it be that then you remembered who I was, and you were still playing tricks on me by pretending to be deaf and dumb?"
She pretended to be angry, but there was an unstoppable smile in her eyes.
Balian held the sword and looked like he was letting her do whatever she wanted.
"How dare you, how dare you, if I had recovered my memory at that time, how could I let Xiaoshuang throw this sword into the lake and abandon it?"
Yin Baishuang retracted his hand and said: "That's right. If you had recovered your memory at that time, how could you hang out with Su Jing, that evil star with a dead face, and protect her everywhere, save her life, and behave in such a way that you are so close to each other?" .”
There was a bit of a taste in the tone of these words. Balian wanted to defend himself, but what Yin Baishuang said was true, so he had no choice but to smile bitterly.
Bailian didn't know the truth at first. Although he and Su Jing were daggers at each other when they met, he treated her with respect and friendship.
But later on, not to mention the intimate contact in the cold pool, let alone the night of drunkenness, if Ning Feiyan hadn't stepped in and tied him up, he would probably never be able to explain to Su Jing in the rest of his life.
But even so, he did not do anything substantial to Su Jing, but in his scattered memories, he was induced to have some skin-to-skin contact with Su Jing that went beyond men and women.
Although he was ignorant at the time, for some reason Su Jinghui, who was indifferent to everyone in the world, was too tolerant towards him.
Now that I think about it carefully, I am afraid that this woman has already had a hundred evil ideas in her mind.
Seeing that he was silent, Yin Baishuang snorted coldly and complained:
"Even if you don't tell me, I can imagine how Su Jing, that sullen guy, would be able to calm down when he saw you. He would be like a hungry wolf seeing fresh meat and delicacies. He would pounce on you and want to eat it. Pick up the back of your neck and bring it into your nest.
I suffered a loss as well. During those two years, you lived on Nanze Mountain. I heard you send a message saying that you ate and slept with her day and night, and were inseparable. You fished in the river naked, and she had nothing to do with it. taboo.
At that time, we all thought he was Taixuan's son. We didn't know she was a woman, but we didn't think so.
Su Guanhai is also a black-hearted person. When you and I went up the mountain, he clearly knew what was going on between you and me, but he deliberately placed his dark and skinny daughter next to you.
The head of a dignified sect doesn't teach his daughter about etiquette, justice and shame, and that men and women need to be guarded against each other. Instead, he just sits back and watches you hanging out with her day and night.
Day and night, over time, she will be able to see clearly your every move and lifestyle. If not, how could she take the opportunity to recognize you. "
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