Hesta stood alone in the corridor outside Anna's study, briefly lost in thought. In this quiet and dark place, for a moment, many chaotic images appeared in Hesta's mind: Alvira's eyes were reflected on the blazing Rohan Palace, and she heard the chirping of birds that could not exist on the sea. With the wind of the jungle, hearing Sophie's smile and the sound of the fireplace beeping and burning at night...
Everything became suspicious, even the narrow corridor she was in now looked like that rainy afternoon. Hesta felt that the world began to hang upside down again, but she just closed her eyes and gently held her forehead with her left hand.
Not far away, Rico noticed something strange about Hesta and quickly put down the cat in his arms.
"Jane, are you okay?"
Hesta tightly grasped Rico's outstretched arm, like a drowning person grasping a branch that suddenly appeared. Rico felt that Hesta's body was already a little unbalanced. She broke away from Hesta and supported the other person's back from behind.
The white cat not far away sat quietly on the ground, staring at this scene intently.
…
About half an hour later, Hestad was back in her wheelchair. After regaining consciousness, she became a little depressed - the first time in a long time that she had experienced mild symptoms during the day. It was indeed right to lock up those two sisters. The loss of control last night also occurred after leaving their room.
Hesta frowned, which she couldn't understand.
Rico handed her a pack of jelly beans, but she didn't take it.
"What should we do with Si Lei?" Li Ge looked at her, "Should we ask someone to find her?"
"I'll ask Miss Chiba later," Hesta covered her head with a hot water bottle and replied in a low voice, "I think she should be fine."
"Why."
"It's hard to say, it's just a feeling." Hesta leaned her head back on the wheelchair with her eyes closed, "Anna won't do anything to her, and the rest of the people have no reason to deal with her. During this time, she I have been tracking the murder on the ship, and have found quite a few clues..."
Rico dragged an iron frame and stood behind Hesta. She took the hot water bottle again and tied it to the iron frame with a rope. Hesta freed her left hand and looked at her tiredly, "Thank you."
"Does your head still hurt?"
"Kind of."
"Why do you have more and more problems? Would it be better if I give you a massage?"
"have no idea……"
Rico removed the hot water bottle, and her fingers sank into Hesta's red hair, gently massaging it. Hesta let out a long breath, and her frown slowly relaxed.
"I took a look at your medicine. It treats a variety of diseases, including tricyclics, statins, and even some anti-epileptic drugs... What disease do you have?"
"It's not really a disease. In essence, some areas of the brain occasionally produce abnormal discharges," Hesta said in a low voice. "The medicines are gradually tried out. Some can alleviate the symptoms, and some can't. In the end, we just left them." We have prepared a batch of products with relatively low side effects..."
"Isn't this child's play?"
"It's all like this..." Hesta whispered, "There is currently no organic disease. They tend to think that it is a psychogenic disease. Maybe they will get better on their own in the future... At least that's what the doctor said. You told me."
"Sounds like a professional counterpart to Miss Valenti."
"...They can't help me." Hesta half-opened her eyes, "I can't possibly tell them everything, and I don't like some of their preconceived notions..."
"Who are you talking about?"
"I can't remember any of the names. This time they sent four therapists to me..." Hesta whispered, "But I know what they think. They think I have something deep inside. Guilty, after all, the deaths of those killed in the 'Assassin' case were too tragic, not to mention other tragedies afterward."
Hesta thought for a moment.
"But there are some things... they don't understand, and they can't understand."
"Then do you feel guilty?" Li Ge asked directly.
Hesta looked up at Rico: "Did you know that Roger has a beautiful lover who not only has a beautiful face, but also can sing well?"
"...How could I know such a thing."
"As soon as Roger died, that man committed suicide." Hesta looked into Rico's eyes, "If you had killed Roger back then, maybe a few of your lovers would have died with him - would you feel guilty? ?”
"If you don't, you won't..." Rico's thumb pressed hard on Hesta's scalp, "You don't have to say such things to disgust me."
"I can't just say 'no'," Hesta resumed her posture. "The therapist will think of this as a defense mechanism. I deny it because I don't dare to face it. Then they will say, solve it." The first step is to realize that the problem exists—"
Li Ge laughed out loud, "Isn't that when you developed your sharp tongue?"
"I really learned a lot..."
Rico's fingertips slid to the back of Hesta's head and suddenly touched a scar. She pulled back her hair and saw a mark left by a suture. Although the skin had grown back, the scar was still vivid.
"Why do you have a bald spot on the back of your head?" Li Ge looked at it carefully, "Who is so capable that he can come around to this position and give you a blow-"
Hesta did not answer immediately. She pushed Rico's hand away lightly, "I accidentally did it myself."
"How could you be careless? How could you be careless?"
"... The road was not stable, and the back of my head hit the ground and hit a big iron bar."
Rico thought thoughtfully, "It looks quite dangerous."
"Yeah, I was afraid of intracranial hemorrhage, so I did a lot of tests..." Hesta rubbed the back of his head until his hair covered the scar again, "I'm fine, Rico, my head doesn't hurt anymore." .”
"Would you like to take a nap?"
"……good."
Rico watched Hesta lie down and pulled up a chair to sit at the head of her bed.
Hesta tilted her head, without closing her eyes, and kept looking at Rico. After a while, she stretched out her hand from the quilt, and Rico took it.
"Have you ever doubted for a moment..." Hesta murmured, "There might be... some kind of 'destiny' in the world?"
"What kind of 'fate'?"
"A... destiny that you want to end with your own hands," Hestad half-closed his eyes. "You endure it for a long time. One day, you finally know that you can put an end to it. You know, a milestone is waiting. If you cross it, the past will always be past...so you...use all your strength to get closer and reach..."
Rico stood up from his chair but still held Hesta's hand. She sat on the floor next to the bed so she could be closer to Hesta.
"And then," Rico asked softly, "is it over?"
(End of chapter)
